I’m getting tired of my Girlfriend (24F) and I don’t know what to do

I (23M) am starting to get sick of my girlfriend. We’ve been together for one year this month, and we were always talking about moving in together.

We live fairly close because we work at the same place but completely different departments so we don’t see each other. We met through mutual friends and we did hit it off.

We sleep over together 3-4 times per week. We have extra everything at our places. Toothbrushes, bathroom stuff, clothes, ect. So it feels like we live together sometimes.

Anyway, she recently found out she has BPD. For those who are not educated on it, it’s a personality disorder based on the fear of abandonment. There is quiet BPD and “loud” or outward BPD. She was diagnosed with quiet bpd.

This means she self sabotages and all her pain she directs inwardly to herself. Well, bpd isn’t that cut and dry. Because the past few months all her anger has been directed to me.

If I don’t text her or call as soon as I arrive home, she blocks me. If I don’t “reassure” her everyday she tells me im emotionally abusive.

And if I don’t preform 2 hour long after-care after sex she accuses me of using her. Obviously after care is important. I love cuddle seshes afterwards. But it’s draining doing this routine all the time.

1. Hold her hand or rub her hair for half hour

2. Take her to the bathroom and help her wash her vag? (Why can’t she do this herself as a grown woman? She doesn’t wash my dick!) -we use condoms btw

3. Carry her to bed and put on a show

4. Make her food

5. Cuddle her to sleep

Now do I mind after care? NO. But when we both work early af in the morning and it’s 10pm and we just finished having sex and I just wanna relax with her by the time the 4 steps is done she’s asleep.

Where’s my aftercare? I asked her this and she flipped out saying men don’t need it like woman so. OKAY.

Sometimes I feel like I’m a robot on auto pilot. I don’t wanna be responsible for her mental health anymore. I don’t wanna be her FP. ( favorite person)

But I don’t know what to do. I don’t wanna send her over the edge as I feel responsible since we’ve been together for a year. And I do love her. But I’m stuck

TLDR: my girlfriend (24F) was recently diagnosed with quiet bpd and her behavior and neediness is driving me (23M) away. I don’t know how to end it softly without pushing her over the edge as I feel responsible for her.

Submitted October 11, 2021 at 08:29PM by ChillPeppery https://ift.tt/3lzp1mU