My (31M) girlfriend (31F) is taking a job with her ex-boyfriend. How do I communicate I want boundaries with him without being overbearing?

My (31M) girlfriend (31F) of 2 years was unfortunately laid off, has been looking for a role, and was offered a job at the small company her ex-boyfriend works at. She remains good friends with the ex (although I've never met him), I trust her completely, but it still kind of weirds me out they're going to be in the same office together.

The job offer is good and I don't really feel it's my place to tell her not to take it nor do I want her to miss out on a good opportunity and employment. That being said, I envision her ex becoming a bigger part of her (and by extension mine) life and I am not too thrilled about that. I don't really want to come home and hear about her day with her ex every day, I'm not really thrilled about the potential for them to travel to conferences (which will come up) or even really go out one-on-one for drinks. Nothing has happened yet, but I see this coming and I think my GF doesn't always reflect on how actions like this may make me feel. Again, I trust her but who wants their significant others' ex to be a constant fixture in life. He also apparently made overtures to get her back after they broke up and isn't seeing anyone so I'm moreso a bit leery about him.

Any idea for how to bring this up? I don't want to sound controlling or that I think she should reneg on working there but I think it's worth having a conversation. When we first started dating, I asked a lot of questions about her being friends with the ex and while she was super forthcoming and understanding she definitely felt like I was being jealous/almost attacking her relationship.

tldr: girlfriend is going to be working with her ex and I want to set boundaries on what is/isn't appropriate

Submitted October 28, 2021 at 03:21PM by dcc77 https://ift.tt/3CoXIBG