Hi. So, I (22F) had a boyfriend (23M) for about 5 years. In the beginning everything was ok. We always lived in different cities but our country is not that big. Everything I did was wrong, everything I said was dumb and over the years he became more rude and stuff.
In January/February this year I met a group of people that made me believe in humanity again. Like if they are happy and can make their decisions why am I here living in a way I don't want because someone want to? Living afraid of doing, saying something that he won't like? I couldn't even tell him I met them.
I started getting attracted to a guy on that group so gained confidence enough to let my ex go. It happens that that guy never had a girl before and was another possessive and aggressive person. I was dealing with confusion between him and my ex's constant messages of saying bad things about me.
I went back to him, stupidly. But tonight, I told him I don't love him anymore. He told me I was the worst person in the entire world, that he would die if he was me, that I will never grow and learn, that I'm just a piece of sh*t that will never learn and understand cuz I'm dumb. He says that I played with him.
Right now I'm struggling between relief and sadness because I've a really low self-esteem + depression and his words are ringing in my head like knifes. I'm even feeling guilty. I wish someone could pass by good vibes. and if you read, thank you so much
tl;dr - Had a relationship for 5 years where everything I did was wrong to him, met someone else, tried, gone wrong, stupidly came back to him and now I'm coping with the fact that I left him again and his words
Submitted October 27, 2021 at 09:18PM by Affectionate-Art7667 https://ift.tt/3birJXV
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