I see my family (Mum, step dad, two step brothers and step sister) a few times a year. My mum and and step dad are narcissistic and bigoted, they’re extremely toxic and have abused me emotionally and physically throughout my life so I avoid them now at all costs, visiting only on special occasions. I only see them so I can stay part of the kids lives. As I know when I was younger I needed someone to look out for me. For some reason, the kids still love their parents and don’t think they’re doing anything wrong, I guess because they’re all they’ve got.
I visited them recently for my brother’s birthday, and I noticed my sister has completely changed in her demeanour towards me. She used to like me, now she treats me with complete contempt. Probably because my mum says horrible things about me to her (they’ve decided that because I live with my boyfriend, unmarried, I am a terrible person). She intentionally insulted me pretty much the entire time I was there, calling me fat and ugly, and put me down, saying things like “you play games where you can get married because you can’t get married in real life”. I honestly don’t want to see them ever again but choose to see them even though it causes me pain, for the sake of the kids.
Every thing I said, she criticised or responded with sarcasm. I’m not exaggerating either. This kid seriously gets no direction or discipline. I know she is probably having a really hard time with the verbal abuse she is receiving from her mum, so I’m trying not to let it get to me, I’m just laughing it off or ignoring it, so I can be there for her and be a good sister for her, and not be dragged down into toxic competitiveness.
But when she insults me she has this look, it is a smile and a cold glare, it’s really malicious and I can tell she wants to hurt me. “You, have friends?” “You think you know how to cook?” “Why is your nose so pointy?” “You have really bushy eyebrows” “why would anyone steal your phone, it’s so old.” And I would look at her. And she would look at me and give me this malicious glare and smile. It’s a very mature, malicious look for a child and it is the exact look my mother would give me when I was young so it’s triggering for me. I know this sounds kind of pathetic as she’s a child, but if she was an adult I would probably tell her to fuck off or never associate myself with her.
I’m not sure what to do, do I keep letting it go, ignoring her jabs and insults, even if it’s hurting me? Or do I tell her that she’s being rude even though she already knows that already? (She’s not dumb).
Tl;dr: my young step sister has suddenly become malicious and spiteful towards me probably because she’s being abused, do I stand up for myself or do I just let it go? How do I stand up for myself to a child?
Submitted October 11, 2021 at 08:51PM by milktea559 https://ift.tt/3ABB3A6
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