So my bf and I have been exclusively unofficial for a few months, we recently made it official. We went to dance class together for my birthday today, and we were there for a total of 15 mins before I left in tears. We've had problems before that we've been able to talk about and work on, mostly around communication and listening.
Basically, we came in and the class already started, and we were learning steps. My bf didn't get the steps right away and I did, so I wanted to lead. He got upset that I asked to lead and wanted to guide us (he told me he felt emasculated and clumsy when I asked to lead) He wasn't looking at me or paying attention to the dancing, getting increasingly frustrated to the point where he stopped dancing with a pout on his face. This really upset me, we were the only ones standing in the middle and not dancing, I tried to just keep going for funsies, but he wasn't budging so I just decided to leave. I was excited to be dancing again and I thought it would be a fun activity for us to do on my birthday, but I should've listened to my gut when he expressed nervousness around the class. He insisted heavily on going after I was trying to get a refund for tickets, so I thought it would be fine.
He came running after me and told me to stop acting ridiculous and just go back up and dance. I was already in tears at this point because he didn't seem to want to dance in the first place and the way the whole thing went down (I said let's just do something else and not go if you're not comfortable, but he insisted we dance) and he was super upset with me when we were dancing.
My gut tells me this is a huge red flag that we are unable to do something as simple as a few steps together, he thinks otherwise. I don't know how to feel or what to think, though my gut really tells me this is perhaps a bigger problem than just dance.
Tldr: My new bf and I have had some listening and communication problems, he gets super frustrated in dance class and we leave within 15 mins in tears. I need advice on whether this is indicative of a red flag, or if we are just incompatible dance partners.
Submitted October 22, 2021 at 11:14PM by Alteregokai https://ift.tt/3b8Zlak
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