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My original post didn’t get much attention but wanted to write an update. Thanks to everyone who commented there.
This has been so much harder than I thought it would be. I feel so fragile and heartbroken.
Before I traveled to see her this week, I decided it was best to let her know prior on Facetime my intentions to move on. I asked her if she still wanted me to travel and she said yes- which I was happy about. The Facetime call was really hard but saying goodbye in person was 10x harder.
We spent about two days together, one of which was her birthday. It was just the two of us the whole time. Our time was a combination of doing normal things together and then talking/crying/comforting each other.
She was so understanding. So much that it really made me question my decision, because she just further proved she is a wonderful person.
Saying goodbye to her felt impossible— I’ve never cried so much in my life. I tried to walk away and couldn’t.
To tie things back to my first post— I am glad I went to see her. I think both of us needed to see each other in person and it brought a sense of closure to the relationship.
But as I type this, I can’t say I have clarity. I really just miss her.
I have to trust myself that my decision was right, that I couldn’t see myself marrying her. I know she deserves to find that, and it was killing me to feel like I was just in the way and not able to provide it. It will be extremely hard to move on, but I know we can.
TL;DR: Broke up over Facetime, but still traveled to see her. Saying goodbye was heartbreaking.
Submitted March 27, 2021 at 10:47PM by CastYourBread https://ift.tt/2QFDZKN
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