I (20F) sometimes get so mad and upset at my boyfriend (22M) over small things but I want to be better.

Hey everyone. I’m not sure where to begin with this so I guess I’ll just start with today. So last night, my boyfriend told me we couldn’t have a sleepover because he was super tired which was fine with me. He also told me he had to help his grandparents move stuff out of their garage this morning which I also knew. I just told him to let me know when we could hang out as we had plans with two other friends today. So today comes and we’re texting and at 11:30 am, he stops answering me. He didn’t end up answering me til 5:00. Naturally, I was getting very upset the whole day and just mad he wasn’t answering. Like really mad. And I know that’s wrong and that he’s busy. This isn’t a trust issue, I did not fear he was doing something bad. I just have this issue where I just feel upset and not cared about when I’m not answered for awhile or get updated about his day. After he finally answered, I was very short and was having attitude with him. I kept saying things like “whatever” and just not being mature which I know.

I then communicated that I wish he would’ve given me a heads up he was going to be gone all day as I was waiting around for him to answer and I felt upset because I had to cancel our plans with friends because he wasn’t answering and ended up being busy the whole day instead of just the morning. So I’m being super short with him and am just frustrated and he apologized but I didn’t feel better. I just kept getting mad because he wasn’t giving me updates about whether we were hanging out later or not or what time. And he told me he was having a bad mental health day and I just felt bad because I still felt upset at him despite him being open to me like that. I said I was having a bad mental health day too. I just feel like a mess.

And now he’s saying maybe we shouldn’t hang out if we’re in bad moods but I was waiting all day to see him and I just feel so deflated. I sometimes just freak out and can be mean or have attitude when these things happen and I want to be better. I don’t have access to therapy at the moment so it’s not an option right now for me. I don’t want any insults or anything towards my character because I know my flaws. I just want pure advice on how to control my outbursts, frustration, and to just be more compassionate and understanding. I find myself saying just not nice things when he does something “wrong” (that’s not even that wrong) and I want to change. So please any genuine helpful advice I can follow is needed. We love each other so much and I want our relationship to continue growing despite this rough patch

TL;DR: I find myself getting upset at my boyfriend for trivial things and then having frustrated outbursts and can be mean. I want to be a better partner and just be more understanding and to better control my feelings. Any advice is welcome.

Submitted March 30, 2021 at 05:17PM by Halloweenqueen2342 https://ift.tt/3u7OBk7