Ex [30M] won't respect my feelings or listen to me [28F] after I broke up with him last Wednesday and it's creeping me out.

TLDR: Ex boyfriend won't get the message that I've repeated multiple times about breaking up and his most recent text creeped me out.

I broke up with my ex last Wednesday over the phone. We were long distance and his behavior exhibited a lot of red flags for me and I felt that was the safest and quickest way for me to get out of that relationship. I didn't go into every nitpicky detail about why I was breaking up. The main reason is I don't even want to be in a relationship, especially with him. We were together for 4ish months (I'm iffy on the specific length of time because he never had a conversation with me about being exclusive. Just started calling me his girlfriend after a month of so of us hanging out).

Before I go into further details, I will expand upon some of the red flags I was uncomfortable with. He would frequently insult me or say something off putting and offensive and would laugh it off as a joke or tell me "just kidding" after he said something mean. For example, I struggle with gaining weight and I mentioned I was worried about some weight I lost while I had the flu for a week and a half and that I was excited to have an appetite again so I could try to gain that weight back. His response was, "yeah, just don't get fucking fat" and later said, "oh I'm kidding. I know your skinny ass can't gain any weight" after I had a negative reaction to the initial fat comment. He insulted my hobbies (drawing and reading) and called the music I listened to "shit." Sometimes he would call me stupid and he frequently spoke in absolutes and generalized and stereotyped a lot of people. Furthermore, he'd have violent, emotional, and irrational reactions to almost anything. It stressed me out because I never knew what would set him off, hence why I began to feel unsafe.

So I wrap up the call on Wednesday telling him I don't want a relationship with him and that I want to move on with my life on my own. No relationships with anyone, especially him. I told him not to contact me prior to ending the phone call.

Saturday rolls around and I'm at home cooking with my friend. He had called me and left a message that he was stopping by to drop off Tupperware for me (the one time he shows up in my city the whole time we were dating and it's after I break up with him). I missed this message as I didn't have my phone on me and and answered the door when he showed up. He whined that he was confused about my phone call from Wednesday and wanted to talk. I repeated everything I said on Wednesday regarding breaking up and told him to leave and that if he was still confused I would call him later and reiterate the same damn thing (I shouldn't have made that promise in hindsight, but I was caught off guard. My mistake).

I didn't call him later. I didn't feel like repeating the same thing. I knew all he wanted was to keep communication up with me in hopes to guilt me back into dating him again. This happened with my first boyfriend and it wasn't going to happen again. My mind was made up. No more contact.

The following day he sent a novel of a message about his side of the thing and even more red flags popped up in it. Once again, I texted him back to stop contacting me as I DID NOT WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM.

Tonight he sent me another message going on about moving back to the city and being there to support me blah blah blah. No respect for any of my wishes. Didn't listen to me at all. I'm livid and creeped out and I'm at a loss on what to do. How many times do I need to repeat this to this guy? I'm frustrated and I have a lot of stuff on my plate between jobs, job hunting, graduate school, and maintaining my personal health.

Edit: Blocked his number. The thing I'm worried about right now is that he'll call and leave voicemails because blocked numbers can still leave voicemails for some reason.

Submitted February 21, 2020 at 08:27PM by throwaway029473 https://ift.tt/3c3j5f8