Background
Known her for 6 months, been official for 4 months.
I think my (22M) girlfriend (24F) is anxiously attached. She thinks so too. This could be a result of my actions because she suggests that she has been/is pretty secure in her past and present relationships. I am fairly busy and I organise my time to the hour, therefore she often feels I prioritise my schedule and myself over her all the time. She feels she is not enough of a priority and that I don't want her as much as she wants me.
Coming to the question
She has told me that she wants me to reassure her about my desire for her and my commitment to the relationship. So, sometimes (not too often) she asks questions like "Will we stay together for (some arbitrary period)?" "Would you leave me if (some hypothetical situation)?" etc.
My answer to these questions is something like "I don't know honestly. I hope we stay together but I can't say for sure if we would. I'll put effort from my side to make sure this works out but there's way too many variables for me to say that we will or we won't stay together. I love you and I want to be with you."
This has often led to arguments. She feels I am not good at calming her anxiety about the relationship while I feel that I answer as honestly as I can.
TL;DR Girlfriend is anxiously attached and asks questions looking for reassurance. I answer honestly and it leads to arguments and hurt.
Submitted February 26, 2020 at 03:10AM by needtosolveaproblem https://ift.tt/2T0d37c
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