My mother in law lives in Mexico, and has never traveled outside of Mexico. And due to a lack of finance and a job, she couldn't get a US tourist visa so she was not able to travel to the US where my husband has been living for 10 years. Instead, he would visit Mexico every year for holdiays. I would tag along for the last 3 years.
And this morning my husband was very happy to find out that his mom's visa is approved. Although I am also happy for him since he's been very longing for that moment where his mom could see her grandson in person and have her over, I also feel a little bit confilicted, as terrible as it sounds.
So the thing is that, my MIL entirely depends financially on my husband. He's been sending her money every month to cover monthly expenses and medical expenses. Which is around $500-$600 every month. Therefore, her travel costs would be entirely on our family of 3. Flight, food, transportation... bear in mind we live in New York City. And my husband wants to have her over every year since the visa is approved eventually.
On top of that, my husband's aunt also wants to come over, who's been a self- acclaimed 'another mom' to my husband due to her lack of children. Also she can't afford a trip to NY so the entire expense will be on us.
We don't struggle financially, but also don't really live that comfortably. I'm always watching my expense. I havent bought myself clothing for a while. Im also in grad school and have to find a job real soon, but can't really afford a nanny more than 4 hours a week due to a costly nanny expense, which has been really hard for me to balance between school/job search and taking care of a baby.
So wrapping my head around the fact that having them over every year on our expenses makes me feel uncomfortable.
But if that were to happen, I want to treat my family(lives in a developing country in Asia) financially the same way his family will be treated when they're traveling, even though they don't particularly need help with money, but I can see that they will really appreciate it, since they're not doing particularly well either. I think it's unfair for my family to spend their own money to travel to the US to see us while my husband's family get a free ride financially. Am I wrong in thinking this way?
Tldr: MIL coming from Mexico to the US, expense is 100% on us. I want to help my family when they're coming to the US even though they don't need help financially the same way my MIL is getting treated. Does it sounds reasonable or no?
Submitted February 27, 2020 at 08:42AM by cosmopigeon22 https://ift.tt/382nlbu
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