This morning was an argument with my husband. I had set up an appointment with an audiologist (at my husband's active encouragement) to be fitted with hearing aids. I had been given a set a long time ago, before we were married, and I stopped wearing them because they hurt the insides of my ears. The audiologist was booked up solid for four months, so I managed to finally book something in the beginning of August. Since they recommend having someone who lives with you come to the appointment with you (to be able to hear stuff and relay information the audiologist might need), I booked it in the afternoon so my husband would be able to come.
After booking it, I told him about it, told him the time and what the doctor recommended. He thought about it, considered the time, and said it should be alright to take me then. Usually, he would just flat out refuse, since he hates to take time off work for any reason (he's a farmer), so I was surprised.
So I was disappointed the yesterday when I reminded him of the appointment and he said he wouldn't be able to take me, and hadn't been planning on it. It felt only worse that I had relied on him to. There had been multiple times in the past (when I had had the flu and I felt too sick to drive, or when I had an extremely painful uti) when he wouldn't take me to the doctor's office. I understand being tired after work and not wanting to drive somewhere else, but when you just got home from a nine day vacation, and you just don't want to, it began to feel like my health was less important to him than his convenience.
So, I told my husband I was thinking about rescheduling my audiologist appointment so I could get a morning slot instead, for my convenience since I would be going by myself. Immediately, my husband was upset- it had taken me so long to schedule this. Why would I reschedule- why wouldn't I just let his mother come to the appointment instead? I was a grown adult and I should be able to take care of these things myself. I told him it was for my convenience since I didn't like driving the busy roads in the afternoons, and I felt uncomfortable bringing his mother on an appointment of a medical nature. I had done that once, and she was extremely supportive, but I had felt so embarrassed afterward. When he sighed and irritatedly told me "Fine, I'll come", I felt suddenly so unimportant. I, probably unwisely, told him I was feeling tired of feeling my health was less important that his convenience. He didn't remember any time when I had needed to be taken to the doctor, so I reminded him.
The argument ended with my husband saying he'd go with me- he'd been considering it last night, and had kept waking up thinking about it, and me saying I was rescheduling was partly what made him so mad.
I feel bad, now. My husband probably was right. I probably shouldn't expect him to help me when I'm sick, and I should be able to take care of myself.
**tl;dr:** My husband initially agreed to come with me to an audiologist appointment, at the audiologist's recommendation, then changed his mind, saying he wouldn't be able to take time off. When I wanted to reschedule, he got upset and gave me a list of reasons why I didn't need him to come with me. I feel bad now, and feel like I should have asked him to take me, and just have gone myself.
Submitted August 04, 2021 at 04:13AM by crapsleeper https://ift.tt/3yq9yJK
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