I'm writing this on behalf of my sister and something that's been happening for the past couple of weeks that was recently bought to my attention involving our youth pastor. I've been at this church much longer than this youth pastor, and I've essentially grown up here ever since I was 9 years old. I'm 17 now writing this because of how they've handled (or not handled) the situation at all
A couple of weeks ago, my sister was pressured into sending pictures to my youth pastor, and she told me about this a couple of days ago. A couple of weeks back, the youth had a night that was dedicated to discussing sexual purity, and the leaders asked the parents if it was okay a few weeks in advance, and my parents told her that she'd be relearning some of the things they taught her about purity when she turned 12, the same things I learned when I was 12 too
According to my sister, the boys and girls were separated into two different groups, and her group included Pastor Derrick (not his real name) and the head pastor's wife while the other had two other leaders as well
The group talked about how current culture is encouraging girls to dress in a way that isn't modest and often encouraging it, and one of the examples she told me about was the Super Bowl and how the halftime dancers are often "inappropriately dressed", as well as how people encourage others who post revealing photos on social media under "bodily acceptance" when in reality, it's "encouraging thoughts that are best saved for marriage" and other stuff like that
They then went around and asked for other examples of how we can find more of this in our everyday lives, and when they asked what we normally post on our socials, one of the examples bought up was photos at the beach which they said are fine there, but "aren't uplifting to others who aren't there", and they said that posting photos of us in bathing suits could encourage other people who aren't there in that environment to "think in other ways that aren't pure and uplifting", and they kept saying how we "have a responsibility as Christians to act in a way that is uplifting to others", and apparently wearing bathing suits at the beach and posting photos doesn't do that because the people who see them, are probably not at the beach where it's acceptable
Another example they bought up was gym attire and how society "makes you think that you have to post everything", and they said that posting photos are basically "showing off" and "trying to get attention" and other stuff like that. Which, like before, was appropriate to wear at the gym, but not appropriate for everyone else who would see the photo at home or wherever else they are. And, personally, I don't like how they stereotyped this whole thing, but that is not where my main issue lies
When they came to my sister, she said that she mostly posts soccer stuff and gymnastics skills, but they told her that she should be careful with the latter because, like before, it's appropriate for the gym, but not for others who aren't there because we must encourage our fellow Christian brethren and other BS that I personally think, but when I told this to my parents, they didn't agree with me and told her to make a separate account for her gymnastics stuff that's kept private for friends from the gym or potential scholarships, and I really disagree and can't stand this purity BS personally, but that's beside the point of why I'm writing this
When I spoke to her a couple of days ago, she told me that Pastor Derrick asked her to send him some gymnastics photos at some point during youth and that our parents didn't believe her when she told them about it. When I asked her how soon she told them and asked if she sent any, she said she told them a few days after, but they didn't believe her, and she also didn't send him anything either, but that he asked again at the next youth meeting, but when she told another leader, they didn't believe her either or in her words, "take her seriously"
I since talked to my parents and told her what she told me and asked them why they didn't believe her, and when I told them that I would inquire about it myself, dad said he would go with me, but he later changed his mind and said that he and mom would go to the church office because it "wouldn't be appropriate for me to be there". They went on a weekday and didn't tell me who they talked to, but said that they said that they said they would look into it
To be honest with you, I'm frustrated with the lack of urgency that they have and how lackadaisical they seem about everything, but after I talked to my sister again, she said that she's scared about what could come from it, and she asked if I could ask mom to let us stay home for a week or two. But when I asked them, they refused to let us stay and said that they could hang around the church on Friday just in case, but she doesn't want to go and they just don't seem to care, and I don't know how else to get through to them at this point
I feel like I've exhausted everything I can to them, but I'm out of ideas on how to get them to take her seriously and not force her to go where he's gonna be, even if they're there. If anyone has advice on how to further help her or get through to my parents, I'd really appreciate that, since I don't know what else to say to make them take it seriously
TL;DR: My youth pastor asked my sister to send him pictures of her, but my parents don't seem to believe her and aren't taking it very seriously in my opinion
Submitted April 06, 2021 at 11:19PM by throwragenesis https://ift.tt/3cUvYuc
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