I’m so frustrated and ashamed even admitting this but I’m at my wits end.
I have been w/ my bf for just under 3 years. I’ll admit, our relationship has had its difficult moments but, it seems like we’ve finally reached a good place as of the past 6 months or so. Lately we’ve been discussing marriage and a looming proposal which I’m so happy about but, I’ve realized I don’t enjoy having sex w/ him.
Sex has always been kind of weird for us, I would say. He had been in one prior relationship before us but had never had sex before whereas Id lost my virginity w/ my first boyfriend and had been in a second relationship prior to meeting him.
Right from the start, sex was so awkward between us but I figured we would grow past it. We tried different positions and methods and ambiances, some of which were fairly enjoyable but, it always felt like i had to talk myself into it and then, when it did happen, I wanted it over as fast as possible.
Let me be clear, I love him very much, I think he’s beautiful and he is my best friend but for some reason, I just don’t enjoy sex w/ him. At first I thought it might’ve been my birth control (Nexplanon) that had fucked w/ my libido but I still have regular sex fantasies in my dreams and feel sexual attraction in general (like when I see an attractive man on TV or something) so I can’t understand why I don’t feel it for him.
The worst is, I tried to talk to him about this, thinking that it’s likely more of his approach towards sex that turns me off more than anything (I really don’t find the timid approach sexy and his personality is much softer than my previous partners) but he took it 180 degrees the other direction and is trying the whole “rough sex, macho man” approach which is even LESS attractive.
I’ve tried to guide him by telling him, maybe try touching me here or try doing this etc but when he does try it, I just…there’s no enjoyment on my end.
I love this guy so much, I don’t want to ruin the relationship over something as trivial as sex. My last relationship was all sex no substance and now this relationship feels like all substance and no sex. What can I do to make us more sexually compatible?
tl;dr: I don’t like having sex w/ my bf and I’m scared it’s going to ruin the relationship.
Submitted April 24, 2021 at 05:58PM by dumbitch_throwRA https://ift.tt/3vgzipR
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