My [M28] husband [M27] is struggling to let go of his need for parental approval and I don't know how to support him
My husband and I have been married for a good few years now but one thing I've always noticed even when were just dating is the odd dynamic between him and his parents. As someone who lost his parents at an early age and spent his teenage years in boarding school, I'm not very familiar with how adults are supposed to be towards their parents so I used to just let things slide especially since they were nice for the most part and I just thought that their dynamic is normal.
Now my husband has been suffering with severe anxiety and depression and at first I never quite understood where it was rooted. Until recently when he quit his job due to workplace bullying and instead of supporting him, his parents sent him messages saying how they were so disappointed of him and how he should've just sucked it up and stayed in the job and then gave him the cold shoulder for at least a couple of weeks for it and then they came over ours one day and what I thought was going to be an apology was instead a pity party / condescending comments banquet and I have a nagging feeling that most of his mental health issues come from his parents.
For the past few months, I've been encouraging him to see a therapist (no win on this part yet) and I've also been talking to him about possibly setting boundaries with his parents because I thought they are not really mentally healthy for him.
I've also thought of moving countries, as I am Australian and he's British, I thought about moving us back to Australia so we can set some geographical boundary between him and his parents and hopefully it would give him the space to get at least some healing. And he seems to be excited about the idea of moving to Australia so I do think it's a good idea.
But other than things I've already mentioned, is there anything else I can do, as his spouse, to support him in getting through this chapter of his life? I understand that this is his fight and not mine and all I can do is watch and cheer him on and perhaps offer some advice but I want to support him as much as I can so I want to pull all the stops but without overdoing it. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
TL;DR
Husband's [M27] parents are potentially causing his anxiety and depression and I want to know how best to support him.
Submitted April 29, 2021 at 12:02AM by MotherOfMetal https://ift.tt/3ubeD6I
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