My (22F) boyfriend (23M) is so upset about his children that were never born and it’s putting a bit of a strain on our relationship.

TLDR : My boyfriend is still very sensitive about his aborted twins even though it’s been years.

I’m 22 and my boyfriend is 23. We’ve been together for two years. Before we were together, he had another girlfriend. She was pregnant with twins. She had an abortion and it absolutely destroyed him. They broke up shortly after and he’s been heartbroken over the babies ever since.

After the abortion he never got the remains but he paid for and had a funeral anyways. He was the only one there aside from the pastor. Apparently he got two infant caskets and put a stuffed animal he bought for the babies in each of them. Several years later he’s still going to their graves two or three times a week. I’ve been there with him sometimes and it’s absolutely heartbreaking. He’ll read to them and talk to them and it’s honestly one of the saddest things I’ve ever seen.

At home one of our closets has baby stuff in it that he got while she was pregnant. He will not sell it or donate it or whatever. I understand that, I never pressure him to. In our room he has the ultrasound pictures framed and on the wall. Almost every day he just stands there and looks at them for a few minutes.

Overall he’s just really down. It seems like he can’t enjoy himself. He never wants to leave our town, which is okay with me. I hear him crying a lot in the bathroom or bedroom alone, but he never cries while I’m around. I know he might always be like this but at some point I just wanna go have fun with him. Fun isn’t his thing. I don’t know what to do.

I feel like he hasn’t moved on. I know there’s no real “moving on” from losing children but I want him to feel better. I want him to have some sort of closure and live his life. I know he loves his babies and nothing will change that but I feel like it’s holding him back. That sounds bad but I really want him to be happy.

Submitted July 21, 2020 at 12:18AM by funeralthrowRA https://ift.tt/3eHrKUw