I had a really shitty childhood which trickled some issues onto my everyday life. It gave me really bad insecurities and I began to rethink my whole life. I then thought that I would be better off if I wasn't around anymore.
Obviously, it didn't work and I was not better off at all. I had two friends for about 1 or 2 years. We'll call one E and the other one M. E has always been sheltered in his family as they are very religious. Though we do have similar issues (sexuality, MH, etc) so I would always end up helping him out, which made us hella close. I would also always be helping M with errands that his parents would give him since they would give him so much. Which is why I think it is complete bullshit that they don't even show one ounce of compassion at all for me. Anyways, I never really told them my issues that helped contribute to my decision so I guess it was a big shock to them.
We were supposed to hangout today but when I got there, they start shouting at me. Mainly M though. E just stayed quiet but eventually, he took the spotlight and started cussing at me. They kept questioning why I did what I did and kept calling me a traitor. I eventually just left. I tried to send them a text to say that I was sorry but they just left on read. About an hour ago, M had blocked me on Snapchat while E just unadded me.
Thing is, I am supposed to stay with my dad in another state for a while. Apparently, my mom thinks it'd be better if I was with him since we were more closer with each other. I don't want to leave my only friends upset and potentially lose them. They are massive assholes but they are still my bestfriends. It sucks having them hate on me though and I just want them to stop. To stop being so mean and cruel for some reason. What the hell do I do?
TLDR; I attempted suicide, my 2 friends are aggressively angry with me and tried to either block me or unadd me on Snapchat, where we usually talk. I have to leave in a week to my dad's place out of state but I don't want to leave them thinking that I abandoned them again. I also want to stay friends with them because, well, we have always been best friends
Submitted July 28, 2020 at 01:44AM by throwawayamiwtf https://ift.tt/337FOoh
No comments:
Post a Comment