My (M24) two best friends (F25 and F23) who have been dating for two years suggested a threesome that I turned down due to alcohol being involved. I am now feeling a desire to be in a relationship with both of them.

TL:DR I turned down a threesome with my best friends due to worries about hurting our friendship. I do want to have a threesome, but I don’t want to hurt our friendship and don’t know what to do.

So, I don’t know where to begin. It’s been a rough couple days for me and I have no clue who to even attempt to talk about this too. If this isn’t the right place I will happily delete my post.

I’ll use S and L for name stand-ins in the story.

So, I’m a straight cis male. My two best friends are both female, bi, and in a relationship together for two years. I’ve been friends with S for longer, but the three of us have been hanging out for a couple years a couple times a week. I’ve never once considered trying to try anything sexual with them because that would be rude. I’ve honest to god never even had the desire too. They’re my best friends and that’s it. Nothing sexual. Well in the past though when at a club S has danced on me pretty sexually and so has L. L once kissed me when fairly drunk but S was not very happy about that. I pulled back though and said we shouldn’t kiss because S wouldn’t be happy and of course I was right.

I say all that to just kinda give an idea of what has happened that could be considered sexual in our relationship.

Anyways...

We’ve been inseparable since covid hit and we’ve been practically living together. They both are out of work due to covid and I work a rotating shift. Any day I’ve had off we are together. We see each other constantly and I hate the days I don’t see them and all I can think about is making it to the next day I get to see them. I love them both so much. We will even send text in our group chat joking about how weird it is to not being together for a day.

Well a week ago some shit happened. It was a Tuesday night and we were together and drinking a good amount. Late at night we found ourselves resting our heads on each other and just talking by the river. It was so nice. Then the three of us switched to a hammock. L and I held hands. We didn’t say a lot to each other but it just felt insanely intimate. S and I ended up cuddling for a bit too and it felt so nice. Well it’s a little hazy because of the booze but one of them suggested skinny dipping. They both immediately took off their clothes and I followed suit. We swam around in the river for a bit and stood on the bank together. L kissed me right in front of S and I started to kiss back but pulled away cause I didn’t want to cause issues. Shorty after is when S starts talking about us having a threesome. She talks about how we all should and how amazing it’d be. L didn’t really say a lot about it but she seemed on board. After S insisted a lot I eventually said something close to “I think this is something we should all wait and decide on going that route when we’re all sober.” S said ok and dropped it. Not long after we all went inside and went to bed in different rooms like normal.

Next morning S apologized for “overly sexualizing” me and said she felt terrible. I told her I thought she had nothing to apologize to me for. That although last night was weird it wasn’t “weird” to me, and that I didn’t regret anything. She ended up asking if we could pretend it didn’t happen. I chuckled and said sure. L and I haven’t talked about it at all. I also asked S if L was mad at her for the things S was saying to me. She said L was not mad.

The thing is... I wanted to have the threesome. I have been getting so close to them over the last couple years and especially since covid. It felt so good to be intimate with them. Maybe it’s because I’ve been lonely lately and single for awhile, but it’s still how I feel. It’s also the first time I’ve felt any strong sexual desire towards them. I said no because we were all drunk. People often regret things they do when drunk. I just didn’t want to lose their friendship or to cause issues in their relationship. It just seemed like such a big jump in our friendship. To go from purely friends to some kinda hodgepodge three way relationship. I just don’t know what to do or how to address any of this. I said sure to acting like it didn’t happen but I feel like I need to talk about it with them. I’m scared of losing them by telling them how it made me feel.

I’ll end my rant there. Thanks for taking the time to read it. I just need people to help talk me through this.

Submitted July 27, 2020 at 06:42PM by Im-ugly-and-Im-proud https://ift.tt/3046cxg