My (33F) family is pushing me to speak to my boyfriend’s (34M) ex-wife to hear her side of the story on their marriage/divorce.

I’ve only recently started dating my boyfriend, but we’ve progressed rather quickly into our relationship. I’m really enjoying my time with him and the process of getting to know each other. I decided to talk to my parents about him and about our relationship especially since things were progressing well and I wanted to share my joy with them.

My parents are anxious about his past marriage - he was married for 10 years and got divorced 3 years ago. He has been forthcoming about this with me from the start and has been open to discussing the topic with me and answers my questions. My parents think it’s crucial that I find his ex-wife or a third party that knew them to get a reference/character assessment on my guy - especially because he and I don’t have any mutual friends or overlapping social circles (we met on a dating app). This practice of seeking out references is kind of standard in our traditional culture. The thought of doing this does not sit well with me at alllll - I prefer gauging his credibility and trustworthiness over time. It also seems unfair to her.

Am I being unreasonable? Should I try and find this chick and talk to her? Should I ask him to recommend a “reference” that I can speak to?

TL;DR: my parents want me to interview my partner’s ex-wife or another 3rd party for an objective assessment on him. I am hesitant. Am I being unreasonable?

Submitted July 28, 2020 at 05:37PM by canishare https://ift.tt/2P0AKtw