It's just been the 2 of us for the past 12 years as her dad and I divorced when she was young. I know this affected her despite my best efforts because he didn't remain very involved in her life. At this point she hasn't seen him in 2 years. I was always terrified she'd grow up with "daddy issues".
She's been in therapy since she was 15. She is beautiful but has serious self-esteem issues. She was very depressed as a younger teenager and has been on medication since then. She experienced some "mean girl" type bullying in grade 8 and shut down. Never had any friends at all in high school (she's very introverted and shy and extremely sensitive and interprets many things as humiliating).
I tried hard to help her. Made sure to build up her self-esteem. Exposed her to anything she showed interest in (music, baking, crafting). Talked to her a lot about life, people, relationships, etc. I was her buddy to try to avoid her feeling totally alone. We'd go to movies, out for brunch, shopping, etc. Honestly I put my own life on hold (happily) so I could keep her busy.
She's 18 now and has a part-time job while finishing high school. She also hasn't made any friends at the job. In fact, she's also experienced the unpleasant situation of other girls at work gossiping behind her back (so common...I know probably all adults have dealt with this crap, but she takes things to heart). She's so quiet and she doesn't know how to make small talk. I've tried to help in that area too but she kind of rolls her eyes at my suggestions lol. She met a boy (21) in November who asked her out.
I was very nervous but also happy for her. She got some confidence. She was having fun. And I was not strict (note: where we live Covid has not shut our city down so she isn't breaking any rules in seeing him).
Lately I've been seeing that he's pulling away. I've been so worried for her because she keeps downplaying it (he keeps breaking dates last minute with excuses that are very flimsy). I didn't want to embarrass her by saying straight out that he's not being honest.
But now it's pretty obvious he's just not interested anymore. He's the first guy she's liked ever. Of course it's not serious, but I know how bad it hurts at that age. I know we all have to go through it. But MY heart is breaking for her....seeing her all dressed up waiting for him, only for him to text 5 mins before he's supposed to arrive saying something came up. I'm just so scared this will further damage her self-esteem and confidence, or maybe even cause the depression to come back. I don't want her thinking anything is wrong with her. But I know she will.
Any idea what I can do? What I can say to her? Any good movies she can watch? I'm just a very worried mom.
tldr: daughter's boyfriend is clearly losing interest and her self-esteem and confidence was already shaky...I'm scared this will further damage her.
Submitted January 08, 2021 at 07:20PM by Ok_Willow5329 https://ift.tt/35p9CwC
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