Hey All,
Update: I texted him asking if we could talk about my concerns. He texted me back saying he needed a bit of space and was very cold/non-responsive to my feelings during the text conversation. I am absolutely gutted and we will not be spending my birthday together tomorrow. He's pushing me away clearly and I have no clue why. This is so different from the guy I thought he was. I'm going to give him space and not expect anything from the relationship. I just can't believe how this is all unfolding. Thanks for the help all!
I've been with my boyfriend for a few months (so, a relatively new relationship) and have noticed a shift recently. This past weekend, he mentioned that he feels we may be spending too much time together (we were spending about 3-5 nights/week) and that I've barely seen my roommates over the past month. I asked him what he felt was a healthy amount of time, and he vaguely said a few nights/week. Later that day he texted me saying he needed his alone time, but that he missed me. I wish he would have just told me he wanted more space during our conversation in person rather than mention I should probably spend more time with my roommates. Ever since this happened, I've been second-guessing/hesitant to initiate us spending time together, whereas before it wasn't something I really had to think about.
He ended up asking to hang out a few days ago, so we did and I spent the night. Generally over the past month or so I would stick around for a few hours in the morning and start my remote workday that way. A week or so ago he mentioned how he really enjoyed it when I stuck around his place and worked remotely. That morning, however, he mentioned that I needed to get going before my parking meter expired and that he was going to leave to get breakfast. This is a stark contrast from how it was a week or two ago, where in the morning he would ask me if I wanted to work at his place for a bit. Before I left, he asked me what kind of cake I wanted (we have plans to spend my birthday together on Friday), but I still couldn't help feeling upset after I left his apartment.
Fast forward to last night, I asked if he wanted to hang out later on. He texted me back saying no but that we will hang out on my birthday on Friday. I responded with "ok" and he responded by texting me a cute picture of a dog, for which I responded "cute." The conversation ended there.
Overall - I'm looking for some advice. This shift I have noticed with the amount of time he wants to spend with me is getting to my head, and I'm concerned he is losing interest. I have no clue how to approach our relationship anymore, and it's making me second guess how I approach things. Reddit - I'd appreciate any feedback on this situation/how I should approach this. I've been really upset but have decided to text him sometime today asking for us to chat tonight about this to see what is going on. I don't feel like I can spend my birthday with him without some form of clarity/resolution.
tl;dr: Partner wants to spend less time together/acting a bit colder recently and it's making me question if his feelings are changing. I'd very much appreciate some advice on how to proceed.
Appreciate all the help! :)
Submitted January 28, 2021 at 05:55AM by BachelorNick https://ift.tt/3r29742
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