We have been together for 4.5 years. We have had problems in our relationship for the last 4-5 months. Mainly because I became suspicious wether my girlfriend was walking her dogs or not.
(Yes, her dogs. You might be thinking why would I care about her dogs? It's because I just love animals in general. I did take them on walks and I did play with them when my girlfriend was working 3 - 4 days a week in 12 hour shifts. I am willing to give up my own wellbeing for the sake of happiness of the dogs.)
Even though we talked peacefully and fought over this issue numerous times, she decided to keep lying to me. At one point I didn't even pay attention to it because no matter what I did or said she wouldn't care about me nor the dogs. I felt angry and disappointed regularly - basically every time I could pick up on hints that she screwed the dogs over. I told her how I felt and how her dishonest behaviour is slowly pushing me away. Instead of addressing this situation she blamed me for being mentally and verbally abusive. That claim was somewhat true because of her tendency to lie about things, I was losing my trust, interest in physical and mental connection towards her and becoming more and more controlling over some things. I started going through her things and paying attention where she was going, for how long, with who, etc...
Some time passed and I noticed she started acting weird. She didn't want to kiss me, she kept carrying her phone with her and always keeping the screen facing down.
My suspicion and distrust grew stronger.
Her 40 year old boss started flirting with her in the beginning of December 2020, after a few weeks they kissed and less than a week later she had sex with him in her work place. Some time went by and she decided to throw her 24th birthday party (she didn't even mention I was welcome there) at her work place on 19th January where they had sex again.
Few days later when I found out about all this I confronted her and said it's all over. We've been separated for a few days now but she says she's sorry and it was a huge mistake and never should've happened. She's basically begging me to take her back and give this relationship another shot.
At the moment I can't even find the correct words to describe how betrayed and angry I feel. I could say I forgive her and say we can try again but I can't get these nasty images out of my mind when I look at her, not to mention lack of emotions when it comes to physical and mental attraction. I'm not sure if that's ever going to change.
What's even more sad is the fact that she didn't come clean about this in December when I was giving her several hints if she's seeing somebody else or not.
What are your thoughts on this? My heart wants me to forgive her but my mind is saying "No".
tl;dr My(29m) girlfriend(24f) of 4.5 years cheated on me with her boss(40m)
Submitted January 26, 2021 at 02:22AM by Erlend_Anderson https://ift.tt/2NEP79t
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