Hi, I’m a first time user and not completely sure if this post is formatted right but I’m trying. This is a long story but recently I’ve started to pull the veil off my eyes as to how I let others treat me and it’s started to shift my perspective on my partner. We have been together 5 months and It feels like my friends and I have compiled a long list of red flags but it’s hard for me because there is also so much good my friends aren’t there for. I’m not entirely sure if I’m blowing this out of proportion so I wanted to run it by an anonymous forum and get unbiased opinions. My friends are pushing that the bad outweighs the good so I am going to list out the bads that are chipping away at our relationship.
My problems with him started with his obsession with his phone/video games/social media. He likes thirst traps all the time but never my pictures. The amount of thirst traps he likes is also concerning but not enough to actually warrant a confrontation. He’s so sucked into his electronics though that it is all he does all day every day. He lives rent free with friends and only has to take out the trash and his dishes and can’t even do that because he’s too busy with video games or his SoundCloud career. Because of his what feels like absence due to electronics I ask him for very minimal reassurance and affection to make sure we are on the same page. Also, he’s my boyfriend and we are in a pandemic I need affection. He’s literally turned me down for cuddling to play video games. Despite always being on his phone he can’t be bothered to send me a text message that doesn’t sound like a grandma or toddler drafted it. They’re all short and bare minimum replies. He acts less than enthusiastic to hang out when I ask and I’ve been trying to give him space. The parts where my friends are saying I need to dump him is because he steals from me, lies about it and also doesn’t seem to care about how I’m actually doing.
One of the big issues is, I have chlamydia. Idk if I got it before my boyfriend or from my boyfriend but either way I went and got diagnosed and received meds for it. Here’s the problem, my boyfriend won’t go to the doctor for himself. He doesn’t have a valid ID and can’t go without one. He refuses to get his ID renewed. So I can’t start my meds if we are still having sex Because if he has it I’m just going to re get it from him. This has caused a huge issues with my friends and has one of my friends breathing down my neck yelling at me to dump him because he doesn’t care about my health. He also has depression which causes this lack of motivation or self care but refuses to get therapy or meds for that either. Another issue my friends are insistent I should dump him for is stealing and lying. My boyfriend and I are avid smokers and I don’t like to travel with it so I leave it at his house. My boyfriend doesn’t have a job, nor does it seem like he intends to get one soon. I currently have a job, an internship and an a full time college student so anything we do I pay for it, anything we smoke I pay for it, anything we eat.. you get the idea. Well I noticed a few times that my “stuff” had gone missing or been severely depleted while I wasn’t there. I confronted him about smoking my supply and he denied it at first. Eventually he admitted to it and apologized. He said he was afraid I’d be mad in the first place so he didn’t want to tell me. Which I for some reason accepted as an excuse. He also eats all the snacks I buy for us while I’m not there. He keeps apologizing for it and hasnt done it since until recently. On New Year’s Eve I found out he stole a small amount of my stuff, I confronted him about it and he threw my grinder at my pipe and screamed at me then ran away from me. This isn’t the first time he has blown up on me for bringing up valid concerns with his treatment. I was afraid to tell my friend about it because I knew she would just tell me to dump him again. She said his behavior was abusive and that he doesn’t respect me. So I guess what I’m getting at here, Reddit, should I break up with him? Is this something I can wait out or is this as good as it will get?
Submitted January 05, 2021 at 01:52PM by Pretty_Mortgage_2597 https://ift.tt/3ohWDEw
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