My ex (someone I dated for 2 years) and I have been broken up for 7 months now. I ended things with him over the summer pretty impulsively because I felt like the relationship was good and comfortable, but I wasn’t sure if we were right for each other (we were each other’s first). Plus I was in a super intense internship that kind of foreshadowed what my first few years out of college will be like as a new teacher.
Fast forward to now. We both have seen other people. But we’re still not over each other and I am starting to think I let go of something great because I’m young and dumb and stupid and have low self esteem/self isolate as a coping mechanism.
We’ve recently started ~casually~ seeing each other again but it’s literally ruining me emotionally. I am already paranoid that he will just find someone better and terminate the casual thing we have going. And I feel so guilty because the two times we broke up, it was me who initiated it. So he really does not owe me anything at all and the last thing I want is for him to be hurt again. But we are both graduating college in a few months and then moving to different cities, and I don’t want to leave with any regrets.
Sorry for the novel. I don’t know what to do.
tl;dr I am young, inexperienced, stupid, and insecure. I've done some growing up and am now realizing that what I really wanted in a relationship + companion was something I already had and gave up
Submitted March 02, 2020 at 04:48AM by cakester710 https://ift.tt/3aqCgxs
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