I (29F) am finding it hard to make friends. And have for years. What am I doing wrong?

I didn’t have trouble making friends in high school. I was overweight and pretty nerdy, yet I drew people in with my personality. People found me funny and endearing and protective.

After high school I gained an interest in fitness and I lost an incredible amount of weight. With this new found confidence I discovered an interest in makeup and fashion. But I all of a sudden lost friends. They claimed I had become narcissistic and vain. I’ve lost count of the amount of jabs that were thrown my way from people that I had come to love so much. Things like ‘your body would be perfect if you had bigger boobs’ or ‘well you’re not That fit anyway.’ It was so venomous and shocking. I sought advice from siblings/family I had known all my life, asking if I had indeed changed for the worst, and they assured me that I was the Same person as prior.

I do find it easier to make friends with quite attractive women. Model like level and what people would probably see as superficial (theyre actually not, they’ve been incredibly lovely in experience). A few have IG model notoriety. Yet it was difficult to maintain the friendships as my interests are still quite different. And I would bore them after some time. They were sweet lovely women and also smart, we just didn’t coincide in areas of interest and so we drifted as life progressed.

My issue now is that I’m a mother of 2 and I still can’t find good deep friendships. I reach out and arrange play dates and then never hear from them again. Or I have set up a catch up, only for them to show up with one of their friends for support :/ It’s bought me to tears a few times, confiding in my sister who says that my looks intimidate and make people feel inadequate and just see me as a threat. I honestly Hate that reason as it sounds so ridiculous. I assume there is especially something wrong with me as a person. I recently joined a mother’s group and it’s been incredibly difficult breaking in as the women tend to give me the cold shoulder. They even avoid eye contact. I wouldn’t say I’m socially awkward as I think I’m ok in that area...What could I be doing wrong?

Tl;dr I find it really hard to make friendships with other women. What could I be doing wrong?

Submitted March 29, 2020 at 10:28PM by Iron_in_velvet https://ift.tt/2WPNto1