TL;DR: My [29] brother [26] married a sociopath [25] who lied about being in nursing school and is now threatening to ruin our family holidays and my nursing school celebration.
When we first met my now SIL 2 years ago, she told us she was in nursing school at a university that is notoriously difficult to get into--it was actually my first choice! (I ended up at a different school and I graduate in December 2018. Woot!)
I had researched her program extensively before I applied to it, and SIL told me a lot of things that didn't add up. I gave her the benefit of the doubt, and I felt I owed it to my brother to make an effort with his wife. Over the next year, I sent her articles and internship opportunities she might be interested in. She posted pics of her "study grind" and even her semester grades on Instagram.
She and my brother live about 5 hours away--when she comes in, my entire family brags about her. They see how hard I work and the sacrifices I've made and assume that she's doing the same. SIL has generated a lot of drama when people have been unable to accommodate her schedule, but she's under a lot of stress and they just brush it off.
Last Christmas, my mom wanted to get SIL some compression socks, and other nurse-y things, so I pulled up the handbook I had downloaded (from when I was looking at their program) to see if there was a certain color socks mentioned in the dress code. I couldn't find anything so I went to the school's Facebook to look at their uniforms. I stumbled across photos of each incoming class, and of course I looked for SIL. Nowhere to be found. I told my mom that something was weird.
My brother was deployed most of last year, so I'm not sure if he knows what is actually going on. (To be perfectly frank, he's a little dense anyway. I love him to death, but man...) I do know she got all her books/tuition covered by the military, and they both decided she should quit her job to focus on school full-time. My parents even covered some of their bills.
When SIL was gifted the socks and a monogrammed clinical bag, she confessed that she had failed and would now be graduating in December 2018 (same time as me) instead of May 2018. She "hadn't started clinicals yet" 3 semesters into the program. I knew that it absolutely was not my place to call her out. I went along with it.
In May of this year, I decided to send her a letter of encouragement for finals, so I looked up the exam schedule (publicly available online). She said thanks, but finals were the previous week. Then she blocked me on Instagram and restricted her Facebook so I can only see public posts. My mom and brother said "oh, well, they reschedule a lot of things in her program." I was livid, so I called the school (didn't impersonate anyone, just tried to sound professional) and asked point-blank if they could confirm she was a student. Nope. Never has been.
The last week of November, my family is doing a mega holiday (because of everyone's schedule, including my brother's deployment) that will be Thanksgiving, mini-Hannukah and a (slightly premature) celebration for my graduation. It has been decided that my SIL and I will be the guests of honor at the nursing-themed gathering. We have family flying in from all over the country, so my mom went all out--rented a space, photographer, professionally done cake with both our names. All that to make SIL feel special and included. What in the hell do I do?
Submitted September 29, 2018 at 12:41PM by OptimisticPangolin https://ift.tt/2zEt8FZ
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