Background: My mom was my dad's second wife. He had two kids before me, and they were already adults by the time I was born. We got along fairly well when I was a child, but drifted apart as I grew older and our dad divorced my mom. They always sided with him, even when he was being outright abusive (he rendered my mother and I homeless for a time, tried to tank her credit, pushed me into situations where I could be hurt or worse, stole $50k from me, and broke or stole numerous personal possessions).
My oldest sister blocked me on social media after a fight when I was 14-15, and my middle sister tried to keep me in her life until I realized my dad was keeping tabs on me through her. By that point I was fed up, and decided to block everyone on his side of the family for my safety and sanity. It's been almost 8 years since I shut down the social media accounts they knew about, changed my number, and moved and I have zero regrets. My life is calmer, I'm taking steps towards recovery (I have been diagnosed with PTSD) and generally happier.
About a year ago, my maternal grandmother approached me and warned me that my sister had seen her at a mall and tried to talk to her about my whereabouts. My grandmother had lied, as far as I'm aware, and said she didn't know, so I tucked the incident away and went on with my life. Fast forward to a few months ago, my mother received an email from her begging for contact and a family, with claims she was no longer in contact with my father and that she wanted us to meet her daughter.
Around the same time, she found my newish, mostly inactive Facebook and sent a similar message, as well as sending a message to my girlfriend saying she's my sister and wants to get to know her. I panicked, blocked her, and disabled the account. My girlfriend blocked her, too after bringing it up with me. While I don't regret maintaining NC, I wonder if I'm in the wrong and should give her a chance. We were close when I was a kid, but that's about it. She's obviously been through a lot and I have sympathy, but not enough to want to compromise my safety for her.
TL;DR - Estranged sister of 8 years keeps trying to contact me through other people. She's used our relationship in the past to keep tabs on me for my abusive father, so I'm wary and keep blocking her. Am I in the wrong?
Submitted September 28, 2018 at 07:15AM by counterserum https://ift.tt/2zDq9h8
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