My ex [32M] can’t get past me [21F] sleeping with someone else even though he said he didn’t want to be with me at first

My ex/fwb is having a tough time getting over me sleeping with someone else so that we can be together even though he didn’t want a future with me at first.

My ex and I decided to be fwb after breakup. Our fwb ended last year when he told me that he’s at an age to settle down. I told him that I had feelings for him and that I wanted to settle down with him. He told me that he didn’t feel the same, didn’t want anything more and just wants to be friends. This crushed me and put me in a bad state. I always thought that we would end up together and him telling me that he didn’t want me ruined me. I knew that I had to get over him before he found someone else because seeing him with someone else would hurt me a lot. I got on tinder and started talking to another guy for 4 months and eventually hooked up with him while still being friends with my ex. My ex and I didn’t have sex but still did things during those 4 months.

A couple months ago my ex got into a bad accident and the doctors said that it’s a miracle he even survived. While recovering in the hospital, some things came up and I had to tell him that I was seeing someone and that we’ve hooked up after the second date. He was devastated. He confessed that he always had feelings for me but now doesn’t know if he can get past me sleeping with someone else. I was shocked since he had told me that he didn’t want a future with me. He said that he didn’t know if we would work out given our age gap and so that’s why he told me he didn’t want a future with me.

Now we are back to our fwb relationship and he’s still deciding if he can get past me sleeping with someone else so that we can be together. It is putting a lot of strain on our relationship and it’s gotten to the point where he’s in a bad mood all day from thinking about it. Is it worth going through all this and waiting to see if he can get past this? He says there are days when he feels like he can get past it and days where he can’t. Lately, our texts have been very one sided and we don’t text that much anymore. He’s really the only person I see myself with. I just don’t know what to do. Any advice or comments are appreciated. Thanks!

TL;DR my ex said he wanted to settle down since he’s at that age now and didn’t want to continue our fwb. After I told him that I had feelings for him, he said that he didn’t feel the same and just wanted to be friends. So I slept with someone else. After that, he admitted that he does have feelings for me but is not sure if he can get past me sleeping with someone else so that we can be together

Submitted February 24, 2021 at 10:13AM by throwwaawayyy1 https://ift.tt/2ZKxtE2