Basically the title, I don't know what to do. My brother has been an alcoholic for at least the past 20 years and his wife called my mom in tears because he hit her and she hit him back. She has no family in this country.
Just a little background: my brother is the eldest of our immigrant family and has had a lot of pressure because of this. He basically helped our entire family grow financially and he's the pride and joy of our parents. We're also Asian so respecting your elders is also a factor as to why my siblings and I don't have a say in his life. We tried our best to help and make him understand, he doesn't listen. I think he's an asshole sober or drunk but his behaviour has been excused time and time again by my parents. Each of my siblings and I have had an incident involving him drunk and we've never had an apology or anything to indicate that he's had any remorse. He keeps driving under the influence and has crashed his car many times, he has also dealt with the police.
My siblings and I have all done our best but everything has fallen onto deaf ears. Having a child didn't make anything better, he's basically passing down his own trauma onto his poor child. This boy is 4 years-old and already hiding his father's corkscrew. We tried making him go see a doctor or attend AA meetings but he could never show us proof and always yelled at us to keep out of it.
My SIL keeps calling my mom whenever he's drunk (he's an unemployed entrepreneur while she takes care of one of their businesses so god know what he does in his office all day) because my brother still sort of listens to her or at least isn't aggressive when talking to her.
Two hours ago she called my mom while she was playing with my nephew, in tears and screaming that my brother had hit her and she hit him back. He went to sleep after a screaming match as he does. I was absolutely lost for words and felt so helpless. My nephew heard and I didn't know what to say when he tried to talk about it because he said it so casually.
My mother is only trying to see my brother's side and protect him and keeps blaming my SIL for talking back at him when he's in his drunk state and "making things worse". Everytime I tell her that the problem isn't my SIL, she says it's my dad's fault.
I don't know what to do, I genuinely hate my brother and he has never listened to me or my siblings once but I want to at least try and protect my SIL and my nephew.
tl;dr: My brother is a long-time alcoholic and passing down his own trauma onto his child and making his family's life hell. My family and I don't know what we can do anymore and we're scared.
Does anybody know what we can do?
Edit: Forgot to add that my nephew has been staying with my parents for the weekend, which is why he wasn't with them when it happened.
Submitted February 27, 2021 at 01:34PM by usernamenotmyown https://ift.tt/3bPIzgJ
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