I (24F) was in an LDR with him (24M) for 2 years. When we broke up 1 year ago it was amicable. However, with some space, I’ve realised that he didn’t treat me well: he (more than once) coerced me into having sex and/or refused to stop when I told him to. He also refused to use protection and spanked me when I had explicitly told him I didn’t like it. There were other minor non-sexual things, like he was cocky, insensitive, and we generally didn’t get along.
I’m now in a healthy and loving relationship and finally realising how fucked up my relationship with my ex was. My ex has messaged me a couple of times in the last few months (only meaning to be friends) and I’ve just found ways to ignore him. This just puts me on edge because I feel bad for ghosting him. There are two problems I’m having rn: (1) I feel like I need to confront my ex and tell him that he assaulted me, but I’m terrified of getting into an argument with him, or that my memory of events is distorted and it wasn’t actually assault. (2) I feel bad because I wasn’t a good partner either-I was needy and quick to anger, so it feels like I have no right to hold anything against him.
I have no idea what to do. I just want to stop feeling bad
TL;DR: I’m pretty sure my ex assaulted me. Do I confront him now, over a year after the breakup, or find another way to get closure?
Submitted January 07, 2021 at 04:52PM by BackDiligent https://ift.tt/3s6Mcpx
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