My (29M) GF (23F) does not want to have a daughter because she feels I will neglect her, but she wants a son.

Hello all,

I am writing because I need advice. Me (29M) and my GF (23F) have been dating for about a year, and we are now discussing moving-in, having kids, the whole Sha-bang, etc.

I love the idea, and I am excited about the prospect of being a father! However, I try not to sound too enthusiastic about it when we discuss, and I try not to bring it up either because I don’t want to pressure or rush my girlfriend into it. I know pregnancy and all the sacrifices that come with bringing a child into this world is a lot to handle. She doesn’t need to feel the pressure from me in addition to that.

One day when we were discussing kids, I told her that I would love to have a daughter… mainly because my mother passed away ten years ago, and I think it would be beautiful to have a baby girl and name her after my mom too. She loved that idea! But as time has gone on, she started to tell me that she hopes for a son because she thinks that if we have a daughter, then I will be a total “girl-dad” and begin to neglect her, and she will ultimately feel unloved.

I tried to reassure her that loving a child, regardless of gender, is a good thing! And that I think we will have to be intentional about showing each other love and making time for just us so that neither of us feels neglected.

I wondered if you guys had any tips about how I can quell my GFs fear that having a baby girl will lead to her feeling neglected? It also kind of hurts a bit to hear from her because the truth is, I know you can’t control the gender of your child, but it would truthfully mean a lot to have a daughter, and it sucks to hear that she doesn’t feel that way.

Thanks!

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tl;dr - gf does not want a daughter because she is afraid I will give the daughter all my attention and neglect her. But does not feel this way about having a son.

Submitted September 28, 2020 at 07:49AM by ImUglyImDumb https://ift.tt/3n3sqcm