In 2013 after an exceptionally bad breakup and graduating from college, I moved to a New City and basically started my life over. After a few weeks of subletting, I found a roommate on Craigslist named Kasie (30F) who I hit it off with immediately. I've always been more of a 'boyfriend girl' in that I was with my ex from tenth grade until college graduation and he was basically my 'best friend' so Kasie was my first real girl BFF.
We lived together for four years until Kasie moved in with her boyfriend Jason (32M) and we had the best time. We almost never fought and spent all of our time at home together. We are both incidentally from the same home state, have a lot of similar interests and personalities and complement each other in lots of ways. I get along super well with Jason too and they never made me feel like a third wheel. I have a larger friend group now in New City and (thankfully) lots of girl friends but Kasie is still my bff and we talk/text constantly, hang out weekly, etc.
The problem: Annie (30F). Annie is Kasie's best friend. They've been best friends since their early 20s and are kind of a package deal. Annie is very cool and smart and funny and she and I are good friends too and there's no competition between us or anything. She and I even hang out without Kasie sometimes. I can't stress enough that we all get along and that this isn't like the movie 'Bridesmaids' or anything!
But... sometimes I feel really sad that Kasie is MY best friend, but Annie is hers. Kasie will refer to me as 'one of her best friends' but we all know that Annie is #1. If Kasie ever says something like, 'You're my favorite!' to Jason he laughs and says, "No, that's Annie.' If Kasie and Jason get married, Annie will be maid of honor, no question. Everyone kind of says 'Kasie-and-Annie' like they're one entity. They have very big and beautiful matching tattoos (though Kasie and I have matching tattoos too, but imagine it being something like a 1 inch potato because we're both from Idaho, whereas Kasie and Annie have gorgeous tattoos that cover most of their upper arm).
I don't know how to get over this sadness. It feels really childish. Kasie doesn't ever make me feel left out and neither does Annie. I love them both. But I guess I'm just jealous that I'm not anyone's 'favorite' in the same way. It feels extra childish of me because I have a boyfriend and I know I'm his favorite, but I guess I just never got to experience having a girl BFF who also considered me her BFF like that. How can I be satisfied with being almost-the-best and not the best?
TL;DR: My best friend, Kasie, has her own best friend, Annie. How can I get over feeling like I'm second best?
Submitted September 30, 2020 at 12:31AM by bffthrowaway313 https://ift.tt/2GqYvcU
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