My roommate and I were college roommates, and moved in together after college because we became really close friends. We've had a rough year from health and work related issues, moved to a city where neither of us really knew anyone, and have been each other's main support. I sort of developed a crush on her. We're both out as some flavor of gay. I got out of a very bad 3-year relationship about a year and a half ago and she's never been in an irl relationship that lasted more than 2 weeks (and only even one of those)
On new year's eve we kissed at midnight, both a little tipsy, just to have someone to kiss. She's kissed my cheek before when she was tipsy-- I kissed her cheek at midnight, she jokingly called me a coward, so I kissed her on the mouth too.
I hosted new years this year and so yesterday was mostly just cleaning, getting over hangovers, and lounging around. We were sitting cozily on the couch together just chilling, and horsing around. she complained about wishing she could get laid this year, and I joked that I'd just settle for someone to make out with. She said "lol same but I'm not any good" And I said "haha I'd make out with you if you wanted." Things got awkward, I felt bad.
She continued goading me into horseplay though, (we have a longstanding history of horseplay, nipping at each other, tickling, throwing things, picking each other up, ect-- I do with all my friends, it's just how I was raised) and she specifically kept goading me into biting her near her mouth. I got brave and stuck my tongue in her mouth. I know she's never had anything more than chaste pecks before. I pulled back, asked if it was okay, and we made out for a little bit. She was smiling a lot but also told me it was "slimey." We had to head out for dinner and it didn't get brought up again for hours, until we were back home. Eventually I asked if I could kiss her again and she said "If I wanted to." I double checked that she was really okay with it and we made out a bit more; she called it a turn on and she sounded like she was enjoying it (tho she's not good lol)
I just... have no idea how to move forward. I'm more experienced than her and she's kind of awkward about this sort of thing. If I ruin our friendship I'll kick myself, but I want to kiss her so bad, it's all I can think about. I know she isn't mad at me or unhappy about it, and everything seems the same, but my heart won't stop beating out of my chest. Also I'm so fucking horny. I've never done something like this without me and the person "confessing" and I don't know what she wants or how to ask or if I should ask? I want to kiss her again.
TL;DR: I (a horny bastard) kissed my roommate (a horny virgin) for like 45 minutes in total yesterday. I want to kiss her more but idk what to do and I'm scared of ruining everything. She's the best friend I've ever had.
Submitted January 02, 2020 at 10:06AM by throwitingarbage https://ift.tt/2sLOelb
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