My [26/f] mom [56/f] and dad [56/m] are going to Korea, they've invited me to go but if I go with them they will put down the family dog [16/m]. How should I traverse this?

My mom was diagnosed with thyroid cancer last year. In my country the recommended course of action for thyroid cancer calls for full or partial removal of the thyroid gland. My mom refused to let them operate on her to remove the cancer and instead she researched many different alternative options that would allow her to keep her thyroid.

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She finally found a treatment called Radiofrequency Ablation (RFA) - a procedure in which a doctor inserts a fine needle into her thyroid and basically burns off the cancerous nodules. The only problem is that they do not offer RFA in my country; however, they do offer it as a successful treatment in Korea.

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My mom and dad have booked their flights to Korea for this week. My mom phoned me sometime last week and told me that I could come as well and that plane tickets would be cheaper if I bought it last minute. I told her that I really would like to go to Korea but I was unsure about the specifics of who would take care of the family dog. My mom told me not to worry about it and that she was going to find someone to look after Snoopy (our dog) so that I could also go to Korea.

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Now, a little bit about Snoopy. He's a beagle/border collie mix, he's about 50-60 lbs. My girlfriend calls him doggy Rasputin. Snoopy's a food driven dog who will steal any food he can whether it's on the counter or straight out of someone's hand. He's always been terrible around food and he should not even be alive for the amount of chocolate that he's gotten into over his lifetime. However, recently his age has caught up to him. Snoop's been in a diaper for the past 6 months or so. My dad called me a few days ago going on about how old Snoopy is and how he can't stand up anymore and how his back legs just don't work well. He also brought up the incontinence issues Snoop's been having. It's progressed from him having no control over his bladder to him accidentally pooping everywhere, it even happens when he's just lying down. He also brought up the fact that most of the time Snoopy can't even get up and down the stairs and some nights mom has to sleep on the couch because Snoopy gets very anxious when he's alone and he tries to climb the stairs by himself which often results in him falling down the stairs.

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My dad really wants to put Snoop down because he believes his quality of life is not very good as it is right now. My mom, on the other hand, does not even want to discuss putting Snoop down. I went over to my parents place for dinner tonight and as my mom was out picking up takeout for us my dad told me that he was going to make the appointment to put Snoopy down this week.

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I feel terrible. I have a feeling that my dad is rushing towards putting the dog down because he knows I want to go to Korea with them and he also knows that Snoopy is not going to be OK with them leaving him for so long. However, dad assured mom and I that this has nothing to do with them going to Korea and it's just Snoopy's time to go.

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My mom still has faith that my uncle will pull through and take Snoopy to his place to care for him. I am doubtful my uncle will do it because he hasn't gotten back to my mom about it and it's been a week. I'm also scared if I buy a plane ticket that my mom will blame me for having to get the dog put down. I honestly have no idea how dad plans on convincing mom that it's Snoopy's time to go. He will probably bring up the fact that there's no one who can take proper care of him while they're in Korea. Does it seem like my dad is using me wanting to go to Korea as a reason to put the dog down? I really don't know what to do in this situation. Any advice would be extremely appreciated.

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TL;DR: Mom is getting a treatment done in Korea, if I go with them there will be nobody to look after our 16 year old dog who needs a lot of help and attention. There's a lot of pressure on me to decide if I want to go to Korea with them. If I go, my dad is going to get the dog put down. If I stay and take care of the dog he will be a sad boy for a week without mom and dad and this may or may not deteriorate him even more. Either way, I believe my dad is ready to let the dog go.

Submitted January 26, 2020 at 06:47PM by UnicornP0rn https://ift.tt/3aJEMjB