BF(26M) broke in my google drive to download my entire chat history backup since 2017. He threw me (30F) out, called me names and made false accusations. Should I give up on this relationship ?

BF(26M) of ~1.5 years creeped me out by downloading and reading my entire chat history since 2017. He now calls me (30F) names and accused me of “sleeping around” as well as giving him STIs. What do I do?

We met in 2018 autumn and fell instantly in love and have been together since.

We had some bumps in the relationship but have been otherwise very close. BF(26M)has once confessed to me he feels insecure with me(30F), as I am older and more experienced.

Yesterday he woke me up and out of the blue asked me to leave his place yet refused to say why. It turned that he logged into my Google drive after I went to bed and downloaded my entire WhatsApp chat history backup since 2017 to his phone and read it all.

He was furious at the texts, chats and flirts that I exchanged with guys long before I got to know him. And he started calling me slut and accusing me of “sleeping around”. In 2017 I was travelling for work a lot globally and maybe as a result not able to develop a stable relationship in either country I most frequent. I was single but was talking to a number guys I met on dating apps. However, I did not sleep around. (Even I reviewed my own chat history and noticed how I mostly flirted but found all sorts of reasons postponing an actual date). Maybe it’s a mixture of boredom, loneliness and some real intention to date someone. Some conversations did lead to a date which did not develop. Although I wasn’t proud of some heavy flirt and sex talks, I don’t find anything wrong with it, as I was single and adult. BF called me names and falsely accuse me of having a series of ONS. I did not. I have had guy who ghosted me after sex, yes, which I was and am feel hurt about and did not share this with BF. Even if I did, it’s not fundamentally wrong as I was single. He dated round and slept with 10+ girls (according to him) before me.

Furthermore, he accused me of giving him STIs and saying he “probably” got herpes (he doesn’t have a doc’s diagnosis). He made the same accusation last year as well. I made him see a doctor, who then confirmed that he was clean. He never apologised for terrorising me with the accusation. Yesterday he made the accusation again. I am sure I don’t have any STIs as I just went to doctors last month and I have been exclusive with him since we started dating.

There is absolutely no reason for any suspicions of infidelity during our relationship. The only thing I can think of that may have triggered is our conversation about open relationship 2 days ago. He wanted to go overseas for a semester or internship and was pushing me to agree to allow him f**k around. I told him it could be possible if certain mutually accepted rules are in place. We didn’t reach any agreement by the end of the negotiation. That’s why I suspected him to have snooped around my chat history to find incriminating matters so that he could push further for what he wanted.

I now feel very violated, humiliated, wronged, angry and sad. I don’t think I did anything wrong nor should I apologise to him for anything. I do however want to get a full STIs test result to put in his face so that he doesn’t drag my name through mud.

Just two days ago I was so convinced about him and wanted to marry him. But now I felt so creeped out that he abused my trust and violated my privacy in such a way - maybe snooping in my phone is one thing but breaking into Google drive to download my chat backup from 3 years ago is creepy at a new level.

I still don’t think I did anything wrong and there is nothing I should apologise for. I’d like to get a full STI screening though and show him the medical report so that he does not drag my name through mud.

I feel very humiliated, wronged, angry and sad. Moreover, I feel very confused. Did I overthink this as his power move? Or he just wanted to find a reason to break up in the ugliest way? Should I just let go of this relationship ? Please advise. What would you do in my shoes.

TL;DR: Bf broke into my google drive to download my entire chat history back up and is furious about me flirting before we even met. He shamed me as slut and accused me of giving him STI (without diagnosis from his side). Should I give up on this relationship?

Submitted January 31, 2020 at 03:26PM by SmolGodzilla https://ift.tt/2S8yXDS