My [29M] wife [27F] of 3 years will not stop asking me to take edibles with her. It seems there's no compromise here and neither of us are happy with the situation.
A bit of relevant background: When we first started dating, my wife was incredibly innocent when it came to things like alcohol and drugs. I had done my fair share of drinking by the time we met, and I still have a beer or two when hanging out with friends every other week or so. She, however, didn't drink and the idea of any other drugs was foreign to her. She loosened up as we were dating (this was a decision she made on her own) and would have a glass of wine to relax or when we went out.
Fast forward to today. Weed was legalized where we live recently. My wife's coworkers/friends like to drink, smoke pot, take edibles, and do the occasional bit of acid/shrooms, etc. I don't and never have had any desire to try weed -- it's just not for me. I don't really have a reason beyond that, I just don't want to take edibles or smoke weed. Or do any other drugs for that matter. When weed was legalized, my wife decided she wanted to try edibles. It was a surprise to me, but we had a discussion about it and I only asked that she doesn't smoke it because I don't like the smell. She was okay with this and has stuck to it, which I've appreciated wholeheartedly.
She will take an edible a few times a week after work. At first, she would genuinely ask if I would take one with her, to which I said no, that I wasn't against her taking them but didn't want to myself. Sometimes still she will ask genuinely, and sometimes she will "jokingly ask" or make quips about it. We've had so many discussions about this. Her repeatedly bringing it up makes me feel like she doesn't respect my decision not to take them and makes me feel like a bad guy. Me not taking them with her makes her really sad, so she continues to ask in hopes that I will one day.
She said she understands why I feel like asking every time isn't being respectful of my opinion/want, but she doesn't understand why I won't take them with her. The problem here is that I don't have a reason beyond having no desire to. I am not against other people partaking, but I just don't want to. I don't like the smell, I know I won't like the taste, and I frankly don't think I need a reason to not want to do a drug. She's tried mushrooms too, and was upset when I told her I didn't want her doing them after that first instance, because they are not legal here. She bought them without me knowing and I was upset she even bought them and brought them home. But we talked and I said "just this once". She jokingly asked if I wanted to join her when she did those as well. If I say "I just don't want to do drugs", she points out that I drink alcohol and that's a drug. She points out that I drink coffee and that caffeine is a drug. I've pointed out that neither of us did drugs (other than drinking alcohol) when we got married, and I didn't anticipate her doing a 180 and having a spouse who does/wants to do legal and non-legal drugs (with which I feel like I've been respectful / flexible to a reasonable point), but who also constantly pressures me to join her.
Reddit...I'm at a loss. Am I'm being unreasonable by not having a solid reason on why I don't want to? Is there something -- anything -- we can do to move past this? I just want her to stop asking and start respecting my opinions, and she just wants me to join her in a past-time she enjoys. Does the fact that I didn't respect her opinion to do mushrooms and told her that I don't want her to do them make me a hypocrite here?
tl;dr: Wife started doing drugs after we married, and takes edibles on the regular. I'm fine with this, but don't want to take them myself. She desperately wants me to take them with her and asks me every time to do so. I feel like she isn't respecting me, but she feels like I don't have a reason not to. What do we do to move past this?
Submitted January 31, 2020 at 01:03AM by noedibles4me https://ift.tt/2uSNw6g
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