I (19M) hate when people touch me.

When I was eight, I was kidnapped and held for eleven months. The things that happened to me has left me with many problems and issues.

I hate tight spaces. I get extremely nervous and anxious in large crowds. I can't sleep in a completely dark room, so I leave my TV on every night. I refuse to be alone in a room with just men. But touching is my biggest thing, I despise someone else's skin touching mine.

I have been in therapy for some time now, and my therapist has told me the best way to progress is to do things that I am comfortable with, while slowly trying uncomfortable things. And that the best way to proceed is to inform my support system of what I am and am not comfortable with, so I won't be triggered by something.

Which leads me to my main issue: how do I tell my mom that everytime she touches me I feel like I've been put into boiling acid?

Some backstory on my mom, I guess. She and my dad had trouble conceiving me, she had an inhospitable womb. After many unsuccessful attempts to get pregnant, along with a few miscarriages, she eventually got pregnant with me and carried me to the full nine months.

However, it was a troubled delivery, and the doctor told her she 100% couldn't carry another child. She was sad that she wouldn't be able to have any more kids, but she says she was ecstatic just to have me.

Since I was born, my mom has been extremely loving and caring to me, and protective. For obvious reasons.

I don't want to put everything into the public, so if you have any questions to help with the advice, just message me.

Ever since I came back, she likes hugging me and holding me, and just touching me in general. She says its to remind her that I'm really there with her. I understand her reasoning, I just don't like the action.

I'm not trying to single her out, but telling her is the most important and will be the most heartbreaking.

Do I let her continue to hug me and just continue to suffer through it? What would be a good compromise?

TL;DR: I hate people touching me, and I have to tell my mom.

Submitted January 27, 2020 at 06:57PM by Kid_With_Issues https://ift.tt/310wAa1