My (20F) boyfriend (20M) said he would leave me if I ever got pregnant and decided to raise the kid. I was never planning to, but I wanted to break up because of it. Am I being unreasonable?

Throwaway because he knows my main account.

My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year now. It’s been really great and he makes me really happy, and it’s like hanging out with my best friend everyday. While we’ve had our differences in the past, we’ve handled it very maturely and have grown from it. We’ve become better partners for each other and have been both very happy with each other’s progress.

However one thing I don’t think he’s ever really dealt with well have been my emotions. He’s gotten better at it, but most of the change in regards to that has come from me. I’ve tried to be less emotional around him and it’d been working so far. But recently I noticed that whenever he has any problem with the way I see him his first instinct is to leave and not to try and fix things. It makes sense, because I’ve always known he’s avoidant, but it hurts whenever it happens.

Recently, he told me that in the off chance we ever got pregnant (I’m on he pill) and I didn’t opt for either an abortion or an adoption, he would leave the relationship and refuse to be called the baby’s father. I never planned to raise a child at this age, but him saying that had completely shut me off. I knew where he was coming from too, he just wanted to be a dad when he knew he could be a good one. But still, I asked to break up.

He acknowledged what he said was callous, but I’m starting to have second thoughts over whether I was too driven by my emotions. It just hurt so much even though I knew it wasn’t something that was going to happen. I’m not sure what I should do.

Edit: Just wanted to clarify, this isn’t to say he wanted to be childless forever. He just didn’t want a child when he wasn’t ready, and could live without one if his partner decided to be childless.

TL;DR: My boyfriend said he would leave me if I got pregnant and didn’t either abort or opt for an adoption. I instinctively broke up with him, but I’m not sure I made the right call.

Submitted May 01, 2019 at 04:22PM by throwadowa5 http://bit.ly/2PEz5co