My youngest brother (I'll call him Zach) and I are 9 years apart. By the time I was 13-14, I was caring for Zach when my parents were at work. This typically wasn't for long periods of time, and I didn't mind watching him. But I want to show that for the last 8-ish years I've been a second mom to Zach.
Fast-forward to today, I make sure Zach gets his homework done, ensure that he's had dinner some nights, take him to friends' houses, and so on. I'm so much of a second parent to him that even my parents and I have noticed how much more receptive Zach is to me than them. If I ask him to put something away or empty the dishwasher, he doesn't fight me like he does my parents. I don't mind doing these things in moderation and am just trying to help out my parents, because I know they need help when they're at work. (And I want to mention that my parents aren't awful people who always leave my brother with me.) I think sometimes I even try to act like a parent to Zach because I know he's receptive to me, and it puts less on my parents to do. However, I'm starting to have an issue when it comes to where my place is as a big sister vs a second mother. I'm always worried about him like he's my own kid and probably treat him similarly to how I would if I had my own.
But I feel like I don't even know how to just be a sister to him. Sometimes I think the age differences plays a role. I’m 22 and will probably have my own kids in a few years, which makes me feel even more worried about how my relationship with Zach will be once my own babies come along. Does anyone have any advice?
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TL;DR! - don't know how to be just a sister my younger brother after years of being a second mother to him
Submitted May 30, 2019 at 02:45PM by honey593 http://bit.ly/2ENizCN
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