My dad [47M] won't take feedback without throwing criticism back in your face, and it's making me [17F] SO ANGRY. Am I overreacting?

Every morning, my dad [47M] uses a cutting board to cut up fruit for his breakfast, and every morning, he leaves the dirty cutting board out until my mom cleans it up. This is kinda starting to really bother me [17F], because even though my dad works less hours than my mom, my mom still does most of the housework. So as he was about to leave the kitchen, I said to him, "Hey Dad, don't forget to clean the cutting board. You always forget to clean it."

And my dad immediately snapped back with, "You're one to talk, with how you leave dirty pots everywhere!"

Sometimes, when I come home late from practice, I've missed dinner and make my own. It's usually just spaghetti with butter and cheese, and only takes one pot to make, so if I'm tired or have a lot of homework, I'll forget to clean the pot until the next day. This happens maybe once a week.

But my dad forgets to clean this cutting board every day. Am I not allowed to ask him to clean it until I reach a point where I never, ever leave a dirty pot on the stove? And how long does my perfect pot cleaning record have to be before I can tell my dad to clean his damn cutting board? A month? A year? The rest of my fucking life? I can easily see myself telling my dad to clean the cutting board and he'll be like, "But you never clean your pots!" And I would pull out a calendar and be like, "It's been 6,489 days since I last forgot to clean a pot," and my dad would respond with something like, "But you used to leave dirty pots around all the time! You'll probably forget to do it on day 6,490!"

Another example is the bathroom window. We don't have a vent in our bathroom, so when we shower, we have to open the window to let out all the steam and defog the mirrors. I occasionally forget to close the window, this maybe happens once a month, but what drives me crazy is that my dad thinks it's way more often!

So my typical post shower routine is dry off --> go into my bedroom to do my skincare because there's no room in the bathroom for my products --> get dressed --> brush my hair --> go back into the bathroom to brush my teeth and put in my contacts.

And I got this down to a science! Usually, by the time I'm putting in my contacts, the last of the fogginess on the mirrors fades. It takes a while! But god forbid my dad walks into the bathroom when I'm in my bedroom taking care of my skin. He'll come pound on my door and be like, "you forgot to close the bathroom window!" AND I DIDN'T! I just didn't close it YET! I WAS GOING TO DO IT! And when I try to tell him this, he just says sarcastically, "Uh huh, yeah right, sure!"

And he uses THIS too, whenever I ask him to do something or point out something he did wrong. "Why should I do X when you can hardly remember to close the bathroom window?!" Aaaaaarrrrrgggggghhhhhhh!

It just makes me feel like I need to be hundred percent perfect before I can give anyone feedback. Like, I never tell my boyfriend anything that's bothering me about him, because I'm scared that he'll throw a flaw of mine back into MY face. Or if I'm working on a group project at school and someone in my group isn't doing something right, I won't say anything then either. Am I being crazy? Am I overreacting to all this??

tl;dr My dad always chews me out whenever I ask him to do something. Am I crazy for being so upset about this?

Submitted September 21, 2019 at 08:24AM by cleanyourfuckingshit https://ift.tt/2QmN2Qf