Here's the details: me, f, mid-late 30s, Wife, f, early 40s (been together for 13+ years, married 11 years) AND wife's friend, aka girl, f, late 20s.
So, wife met girl at lesbian group at gay community center less than 4 months ago. Wife has given girl a ride home a handful or so times after group (I usually work that night and can't go). A few weeks ago wife invited girl over to discuss a project they both want to work on. The following week girl came over again. While girl was over the first time, she brought soda and ice cream for herself (drank out of bottle and ate straight from carton) and left them in our fridge/freezer for "next time".
Wife went out of town for a few days, and I had a couple friends over to hang out. I invited girl because I want to get to know her a little more since she's come over a couple times and is friends with wife.
While over, girl proclaims she knows wife better than anyone, including me. I shut her down politely. She claims she practically lives with us since she's come over a bunch and has food in our fridge. I remind her (and inform everyone else) girl has only been over twice, and only has food in our fridge because she won't take it home, and no one else likes it. Girl tells my other guests that wife is her best friend, and wife told her that she is wife's best friend. I rolled my eyes because wife doesn't talk to girl about ANYTHING going on in our/wife's life, she mainly listens to girl complain about her own life and depression. (Wife has friends she actually spends times with, and willingly and actively chooses to hang with, and Girl isn't one of them). Girl claims Wife and her have a deep understanding and relationship that no one else could possibly have or understand, including me.
I manage to change the subject, and as the night goes on, guests slowly leave. Finally, there is only girl and one other friend. Other friend wants to talk spirituality with me, girl doesn't want to because she's an atheist. Girl takes control of conversation for another hour, bashing old friends and exes we all know personally from lesbian group and events.
Finally, I decide it's time to talk about spirituality. I tell Girl if she doesn't want to talk about it, perhaps she should head home and get some sleep (it's nearly 3am and she'd been over since noon). She tries to gain control of conversation again, and says she's suddenly very depressed. Other friend and I don't give in this time. We tell her to talk to her therapist in the morning (she said her appointment was first thing in the morning), and order her a lyft home. Finally, other friend and I get a few moments to talk about spirituality.
I feel like I should reiterate, wife and Girl met in June. Aside from the shared project, they have virtually nothing in common. Girl is unemployed and living off daddy's money, wife has full time job and lives off what we make. Girl is single, wife is, well, my wife. Girl is vocally an atheist, wife (like myself) is very spiritual, having experienced a near death experience. I should also mention, wife is girl's type.
Wife gets back into town in 2 days, and I plan on talking to her about all this (too weird to talk about over the phone) but I'm not sure how to deal with/handle girl.
Any suggestions?
tl:dr- wife has a friend who thinks her relationship with my wife is way deeper than it is, and genuinely believes it's stronger than wife's relationship with me. Had her over one day and she told all the guests this is fact. I corrected her, but she kept insisting.
How do I handle this?
Thanks!
Submitted September 27, 2019 at 01:31AM by ViRandomCrazyGirl https://ift.tt/2nazEAQ
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