My [19F] girlfriend’s [18F] dad died unexpectedly in his sleep last night and I have no idea what to do

He was an unhealthy guy but not to the point where anyone saw this coming. My gf and I have been together for 2.5 years now and we’re really serious, planning on moving in together next school year.

I haven’t even talked to her today. My dad called me this morning and told me, as they were both doctors so my dad knew him. Before I found out I’d texted her asking if she wanted to study together somewhere or something. Sometime after I found out she texted me back saying “can’t going home.” (We go to the same college 50 mins from our home town.) I texted her a little paragraph telling her that my dad called me telling me what happened, that I’m here for her whenever she’s ready to talk to me, and that I love her. Also that I’ll also be home for the rest of the week as well.

She hasn’t texted me back yet which is fine because I’m the one who told her to take space until she’s ready and needs me. I know her really well and generally her response to stress and sadness is to take time by herself rather than coming to cry on my shoulder. But at the same time not hearing from her is killing me—almost as much as even trying to imagine what the fuck she must be going through right now.

I’m tempted to ask her if she wants me to bring her some comfort food or something. She’s at home with her mom and brother (19M) right now. Her parents were divorced for a while so I’m not sure how it’s affecting her mom but I digress.

Thanks if you made it this far. I guess what I’m asking is if it truly is best to not send her a single text until she texts me, even if that’s days and days from now, or if I should gently ask her if she wants me to swing by with her favorite restaurant foods and coffee or anything else that’s tangible comfort across the next few days to offer my support. I don’t know when or if she’s coming back to campus but I’ll be going back on Sunday.

TL;DR I don’t know how to approach my gf after her dad passed. I don’t know if leaving her in silence and not making the first move to reach out will make things better or worse because I don’t even know if she has the willpower to talk to me even if she does need me right now. Any advice is really appreciated. Thank you.

Submitted September 26, 2019 at 04:46PM by littlerat098 https://ift.tt/2lHAgNW