So this might be kind of a long one. I am in a situation where I feel I have done slightly wrong, but don't feel the punishment fits the crime, especially with the lack of trust involved.
I work in a small office of 8, 2 females, the rest male. One of the females I get on with quite well, have a laugh etc. She added me on Facebook about 3 months ago. I can't remember the exact details of the messages for reasons that will become clear shortly, but I sent an FB message saying thanks for the add and she sent back a thumbs up. Then I sent a thumbs up back, which for some reason was smaller than her thumbs up. So she wrote "size matters" then a laughing emoji and I just sent back a laughing emoji too.
My FB messenger is logged onto my wife's I pad because I broke my phone some months previously, no biggy, I don't have anything to hide or anything interesting for her to read. About a week later I'm going through my messages and think, you know what, that "size matters" thing could be construed as suggestive if my wife reads it, so I delete the thread, just to save hassle.
Well no, i get a text from my wife saying she went onto messenger to log on to hers because her phone had died and noticed that the text thread from my colleague had disappeared and started accusing me of hiding stuff. I just explained that this is what the messages had said, so said I had deleted them and why. Obviously this was too convenient and we had pretty much a 3 day argument about it. During this argument she said if I ever was at an event other than work with this woman, then I would be choosing her and she wouldn't want to be with me anymore. I argued that if I went to an event with my work, I'd be choosing my freedom to do as I please.
Things have been going really well the past 6 weeks or so, but now a work event has been arranged. It starts during work time and obviously my wife isn't happy about it and says if I go then I won't get back in the house.
Is this really a hill to die on, or should I just swallow my pride and not go, bearing in mind this will set a precedent for future nights out/events etc. I feel that although I shouldn't have deleted the thread of texts, there is no way I would cheat on my wife with this woman, or anyone else for that matter. I love my wife but I feel a real lack of trust here, although it's partly warranted, despite the lack of any other evidence of cheating. I am at home whenever I'm not at work so there's no real scope for it.
Anyway, this has rambled on a bit, I'm at a loss for what to do and any advice is appreciated.
TL;DR: Deleted text thread with colleague due to mild sexual innuendo, backfired.
Submitted April 29, 2019 at 06:48AM by kobayashi11 http://bit.ly/2ZJdvIr
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