My (23F) boyfriend (23M) wants to take out a 100k loan eventually to open up his business idea of reselling shoes. He is serious about it. Am I valid to be worrying a little/ concerned?

My boyfriend and I have only been dating for 3 months, but we have a lot of love and care for each other. We talk about the eventual future and everything is great except we have very different career paths.

He is very entrepreneurship and business oriented. He graduated with a degree in real estate, however he does not plan on pursuing his license anymore. His current source of income comes from the art of flipping shoes. You buy shoes for retail/low and sell high. He wants to turn this into a bigger business, but he needs capital to start doing that. He plans on taking out 100k if not more in loans to get this started. He has currently taken out 5k in loans. For what it’s worth, he does a good job selling, but this new prospect of $100k+ in loans has me worried.

Naturally, as his girlfriend, I am supportive of his goals and I am very attracted to people who are passionate. My belief is that if you’re passionate enough about something, you will make it far in life. However, I guess I am starting to have doubts with him suggesting this big investment. Initially, I knew what I was getting myself into when I started dating him. But, I was maybe led astray because when we first started dating, he was still pursuing his real estate license but has since quit and is focusing on the shoe market. I have started to worry a little. His parents think it’s best that he pursues a “normal” job for at least two years before he commits to this big business idea. We both come from Asian families, so my mom has also mentioned how I should encourage him to finish his real estate license so we can both live comfortably and not worry about money all the time. My mom also looks down on him selling shoes and says “he can’t sell shoes for the rest of his life” and says that it’s embarrassing to tell our family members what he does and that I should lie and say he does real estate... which is a whole other conversation— it’s hurtful my mom says that and it puts a lot of pressure on me. I come from a background where my parents always argued and fought over financial instability/money. Money has always been the center of arguments and the reason why my parents separated. I think I’m just worried about my future with my boyfriend. I really want us to work out, but I also want us both to live comfortably financially as hes talked about the possibilities of marriage and kids. It seems he’s committed to us even this early on, but he doesn’t seem to understand why I am worrying and doubting him, so we’ve argued today. I know it hurts him, and he’s said he wants to prove the world wrong. I hate seeing him like this and I feel so terrible. But he can’t seem to understand my worries come from traumas from my past family life and for that reason, I want to change the future for myself.

Currently, I am in my masters program and I am already knee deep in student loans. So, please Reddit, how can I talk to him? Am I valid for worrying? How can I reassure him that I believe in him, but I am scared that he’s risking so much? I really want us to stay together and he does too so breaking up isn’t an option we’ve considered quite yet. We know we are both young and we’ve got ways to go, but someone with wisdom please—- how do I go about this and worry less and trust more in his abilities and his confidence that this will work out?

TLDR: my boyfriend is making some big business moves and I don’t know how to not worry about the future

Submitted May 03, 2021 at 05:24PM by elephantfeelings https://ift.tt/3xIqJ9m