My boyfriend (32M) is friends with his ex (30F). At the beginning it was really tough for me every time they would get together and hangout (28F) then I met her in person and she got a boyfriend. We talked and she kept mentioning “when I dated him (my bf) he was like this” and when I talk to my boyfriend he does the same, we have chats he’ll say “oh my ex would do blank when it came to this same situation”.
It was okay for a couple of weeks between all of us. Now she’s about to break up with her boyfriend and she’s contacting my bf constantly. Dropping off random gifts and asking to do things for him and pick up things for him.
Yesterday I met his mother for the first time (my bf and his mom haven’t been speaking for 2 years) and his ex girlfriend stopped by to say hi cause “she missed his mom”. I felt incredibly disrespected. I said nothing because it was about him, his birthday.
Last night he had a party (just a couple close friends) for his birthday and the entire time my bf and his ex were flirting, he sat next to her, they were following each other in and out of the house, I was ignored by him. I turned off. I went inward.
His ex is overly talkative overly flirty and super obnoxious. I’m shy, respectable and reserved.
I feel like I’ve been more than accommodating. My heart hurts.
Obviously my story is highlighting the negative parts, but I need to mention that he’s been a great partner. We’ve been together for almost a year, my family loves him and so do I.
It needs to be mentioned that I have talked to him about his ex girlfriend being around and he said that it’s something I need to deal with. I’m trying.
I’m asking for your advice? Especially anyone who has been through or is going through a similar situation.
His ex girlfriend is not a threat. His heart is with me. I need to get past myself. These are things I know to be true, so why does it bug me so much when she’s around?
I’m going to talk to both of them separately and ask that they refrain from saying “when I was dating so and so” because it’s crossing my boundaries. I feel like there’s three people in my relationship.
How do you deal with matters like this y’all?
Much love. Thanks in advance 🙏
Tl;dr my boyfriend is friends with his ex girlfriend, I’m trying my best to be accommodating and it really hurts me.
Submitted May 23, 2021 at 03:36PM by Better_Course3900 https://ift.tt/3bOFE8H
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