I (26/f) think my boyfriend (33/m) might have Borderline Personality Disorder...I'd like to somehow get him help.

I have been dating someone for a little while now, and I've noticed erratic behaviors from him often. He is very intense in his emotions, and his reactions are disproportionate to the trigger. He also tends to idealize me and then devalue me intensely, including being extremely controlling and suspicious, often accusing me of the absolute worst. He often questions me when I say I'm going to dinner with my parents or when I don't answer my phone within a certain amount of time, often accusing me of going out on other dates or going out to the bar when I'm at home sleeping or working. He can go from telling me how smart and beautiful I am, to being extremely disrespectful at the drop of a hat that same day as well. I've realized that it's gotten to be too much, and I want out of the relationship. I feel somewhat guilty, though, because he seems to have a lot of self-sabotaging/self-destructive tendencies, and he can't maintain personal relationships well it seems. I feel bad just abandoning him, even though I know I shouldn't. I still do care about him, and I'd like to help him seek the help he truly needs. I'm by no means a professional, but he seems to be exhibiting a lot of signs of BPD. Anyway, I just don't know how to go about it in the best way. Thoughts?

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Tl;dr: boyfriend has some sort of mental illness, and I want to help him but don't know how. Suggestions?

Submitted July 26, 2019 at 02:32PM by katkat91 https://ift.tt/2KkMEf9