I think my husband [M32] of 10 years is hiding something from me [F31] and I don't know why or what.

I promise that I'm usually not paranoid or insane and I know that this sounds both paranoid and insane. I'm struggling with trusting my instincts versus not ruining my marriage.

My husband is acting different and I'm not sure why or exactly how, even. After very careful thought, it feels most like he is not telling me something or is hiding something. He is not great at keeping secrets or lying and the way that he acts when he is trying to do those things is what I'm picking up on now.

This has been going on for about 6-8 months. There was no clear starting point, just something that kind of crept up and I realized one day.

I'm not completely stupid and paranoid so I casually mentioned it to him, that something just seems off and if he would like to talk about anything then I'm happy to. He shrugged and said there was nothing. I brought it up again about three months later, a little more insistently, with a few examples of how something just seems off. He said maybe he is stressed about work or something.

I put it out of my mind for weeks at a time but I keep realizing it again and again. Something is just different and weird.

We've never had a major issue with trust or honesty, other than minor bumps in the road. One time I found nude photos of an ex-girlfriend that he had kept after their breakup. That wasn't really a big deal to me but it's an example of our general nothingburger. One time I found out that he had been secretly drinking quite a bit during the day while unemployed, and that was much more concerning to me. He has stopped that, as far as I know.

I'm not going to keep confronting him like a crazy person or snooping through his business but this feeling or intuition is getting stronger. If he does have some sort of secret then he can either tell me or not. But I'm not sure what to do or how to deal with these feelings. This feeling is nagging at me and it's getting louder lately.

Lastly, I asked my friends and therapist if they think I'm just being paranoid. I kind of wanted it to be that but they all said that I need to trust my intuition. Okay and what does that mean? Some friends recommended I go through his phone and stuff which I am not going to do.

Tl;dr: Psycho jealous wife thinks husband is up to something but has zero evidence other than a hinky feeling.

Submitted May 26, 2019 at 12:51PM by Throwaway48382828284 http://bit.ly/2MaFXQE