Been together for 6 months.
As it says in the title, he thinks of sex as a sport basically — he always needs to outdo himself, last more, make me cum more etc. leading to obvious disappointment on his end. Then he becomes super insecure about it and I have to reassure him endlessly.
More often than not it’s actually pretty great sex, but still, he can’t give himself a break. He treats it as a competition against himself, he has to do better (in his own opinion) every single time. And it’s really tiring trying to shelter his feelings from himself — I’ve caught myself faking a 3rd orgasm because last time he’d make me cum twice so if I didn’t come three times this time I would have to cheer him up and etc.
I’ve already told him sex is an intimate moment and not a sport but he doesn’t seem to get it.
He started having sex a bit later in life than most people so I get that he’s insecure but he’s actually great in bed and I always love the sex, but unless he feels like he absolutely outdid himself he will be sad and I will have to cheer him up and he will say I’m lying to make him feel better and it’s soooo exhausting. What do I do?
TL;DR: boyfriend is extremely insecure about sex, treats it as competition with himself, needs to outdo himself every time. I’m tired of reassuring him right after we just had sex. What to do?
Submitted May 03, 2019 at 10:25AM by BatesBFThrowaway http://bit.ly/2GOTfwg
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