I (16F) recently dicovered that my Dad (71M) is actually my Grand Uncle and my Biological Dad (40M) is someone I considered my older Cousion.

So I am a wreck right now and I really dont know what to do about this. Also ALT account as this situation is very specific and I dont want people to know.

A few months ago my mum died. She was always very sick but recently got worse and died. My dad really took it hard. He was always a very angry and scary dad but mum always calmed him down and as she is not here anymore, he has been very aggressive lately. If something is not done very fast, he just blows up and he also has not been very talkative. He never was much but he just dosent talk to me lately. Now 4 days ago my Dads older brother (my Uncle), his wife, their eldest son and his wife visited. My Dad was very uneasy during their visit. Now the eldest son, the man I considerd my cousin lives in a different country with his wife and children. They are very well off people with great lives abroad as far as I know. It was a bit weird to hear that they decided to visit their home country for the first time ever as far as I know, due to the death of my mum. This was my first time meeting him and his wife because as far as I know they never came back to visit. So during their visit, Aunt and cousins wife were constantly trying to get me to go on the side, it was a bit uneasy to see my Dad making excuses for me to not to go anywhere while them asking me to show them around the house. They did in the end and when we were alone they started asking me how I was and If I was doing well and such. At that point I just got emotional and started crying. As this was going on, I heard my dad getting very angry and shouting. While my Aunt decided to go and see what was going on, cousins wife stayed with me. So for an hour we stayed in the room during which cousins wife basically decided to ask me about my whole history and every few minutues she would hug me and such. So after an hour we were called back and there my Dad was just sitting and very angry looking. My cousin spoke first and said that as me and my Dad lived so far away from the whole family (we live about a 9 hours drive away from our extended family) and needed support they wanted us to come and spend a few months in our family home to relax.

Dad looked very uncomfortable with the idea but didnt say anything. So cousin asked his wife to help me pack up and told his mother to help my dad pack up. I honestly wanted to get away and did not mind this idea. Being alone with Dad was very uncomfortable. While we were packing up, I heard Dad started screaming again. He came inside my room and told cousins wife to get out. Cousin then said something about having an agreement and that this was my mothers wish and such. I didnt understand what they were saying fully but I got the basic idea that as my Dad can be a very weird person at times, there was an agreement which was agreed upon by my mum regarding me moving away after her death. They continued to beg him to cone with them and stay a few days with them back at the family home which is about 9 hours away where we live. It took a long time but he agreed. We traveled by air to go the house. There still Dad was very uncomfortable and was rude to everyone. He clearly didnt want to be there. After a session of him being rude, cousins wife took me to another room and was like that I have to tell you something. She told me that years ago when she and my cousin married, they had twins in the coming year and they decided to give of of the babies to my Dad as he and his wife never had any kids of their own. Implying that I was the kid. She said that they didnt want to give me away due to my Dad being Autistic and being very emotionaly unstable but as there was family pressure and that my Mum was there who everyone loved, they agreed. So cousin is actaully my Biological Dad and his wife is my Biological Mum and my Aunt is my Grandma with my Mum being my Grand Aunt and Dad being my Grand Uncle. She wanted me to come with them to the country they lived in and to complete my studies there meanwhile they wanted my Dad to live with his older brother or near enough so he could be taken care of. I just dont know what to say or do here. My Dad has left the desicion on me. Also really my Dad is a great person and I really dont want to hurt him but I kinda want to move. I always wanted a sister and knowing that now I have 2 sisters with a younger brother, I kind of want to. So what do you all think?

What should I do here?

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TL/DR: Discovered Cousin is my Bio Dad and Bio Mum wants me to go back with them to the country where they live as my Mum has died.

Submitted May 03, 2019 at 11:16AM by WhattodohereMellow http://bit.ly/2H1Br2t