My (27/F) roommate and friend (32/M) of two years said something very worrying to another girl at our apartment and doesn’t understand why it’s wrong.

He has a hair person that comes over twice a month to cut his hair. She’s a sweet person, really great with hair and moved here from Japan a few years ago. To my knowledge she’s been cutting his hair for the past year, so they’re quite familiar at this point.

The thing is she was in a relationship until a couple of months ago, so now she’s going on dates and all of that, making up for lost time. I believe it came up in conversation when she was cutting his hair last night. She was just making conversation. He, for some reason, took that as a sign that she was interested in him, and proceeded to ask if she wanted to fuck right there at the apartment, whilst she was still cutting his hair. I wasn’t there, so I don’t know how it was said.

I just remember coming home to find my roommate telling me that he probably has to find someone new to cut his hair now. I asked why and he told me that, he asked the current one if she wants to “fuck” to which she obviously said no, and then left him with his hair partially cut, in tears. He said he has no idea why she was so upset about it, as she’s known him for long enough to get how he speaks sometimes and to understand not to take him seriously.

I explained to him that she was (1) working, (2) at his apartment alone with him where anything could have happened and (3) coming off of a broken engagement and obviously not in the right emotional state.

Of course she left in tears.

I told him that if I were her, I’d have snipped his ear off and walked out. You don’t get to make sexual advances at someone who has shown no interest in you and who’s in the middle of a non-sexual service that you’re paying them for.

He still doesn’t think it was a big deal, and he wanted me to contact her and convince her to keep cutting his hair, or at the very least to finish the cut that she was giving him before she left. He’s very particular about his hair, and she’s pretty much the only person who can cut it exactly how he wants it, which I get, but in that case, maybe don’t ask her to fuck whilst she’s just trying to do her job.

It’s really worrying that he can’t see how he’s wrong for what he said. I’m honestly so disgusted with him. I’ve always known that he was a really sexual person, which is completely okay, but to put her in such an awkward and uncomfortable position, and then make it out as if she overreacted, is just too much.

I feel like maybe he can see how he fucked up, but he’s acting like he can’t because he doesn’t want to admit that he was wrong. Either way I really don’t know if I even want to live with this guy anymore. It’s so relatable, what happened to her. The fact that it was at my own apartment, makes me sick. Personally I’m shocked that he would do that and not see how it’s wrong, especially after she cried and left. I would never have moved in with him if I knew he could be this way. I feel like I should maybe contact her to see if anything more happened. But I’m not sure if that’s appropriate. Or my place at all.

What should I do? Also is it worth it to try and see if I can get through to him? Just to make sure nothing like this happens again. Even if they’re friends, it’s not okay to make sexual advances at her whilst she’s working. At home or anywhere else.

tl;dr She comes over to cut his hair twice a month. This time he asked her if she wanted to fuck, to which she said no and left in tears. He doesn’t get why that’s wrong. Even after I explained to him that she was working at the time, doing a non-sexual service that he paid her for, and at his apartment of all places. I’m pretty disgusted by him, and his lack of understanding. He thinks she overreacted. Would it be too much for me to contact her to make sure nothing else happened?

Submitted November 15, 2018 at 04:41AM by roommateproblem89 https://ift.tt/2zaw1xT