First, let's not make this a political discussion, please. There are other places for that.
I was watching Meghan McCain's eulogy for her father, John McCain, a United States Senator who recently died after a battle with glioblastoma multiforme - the same brain cancer that killed my own father - and heard a lot of interesting things that have some implications for and on "Red Pill" theory.
Here's a link to the ABC News recording of the speech:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYcHx3n3Rss
This speech was hard to watch - you can't help but to feel for this woman after losing her father, especially if, like me, you've recently lost your own father.
There are some interesting gems in her speech, in the way she talks about her father, that may shed some light on female expectations of men in the modern age. As most of us know, women form their base of reference for "what is a man?" based in part on their fathers behaviors and personalities. Ms. McCain's speech may offer insight for some of us.
A brief overview for our friends outside of The United States:
It's unfair to expect those outside my own country to know our public figures, and in that spirit of fairness, I offer a very brief explanation of who the man was:
John McCain was the son of a US Navy admiral who served as a US Naval Aviator during our conflict in Vietnam. He was captured by the enemy in war time, imprisoned in what is now infamously known as the "Hanoi Hilton", and tortured over a series of years. To prevent the enemy from using them in propaganda, the POWs at the Hanoi Hilton refused to be released except in the order in which they were captured; first-come, first served in other words. But when the Communist North Vietnamese learned that McCain's father was a US Navy Admiral and had recently been promoted to commander of all US forces in the Vietnam theater, they offered McCain an early release, which they hoped they could spin for propaganda purposes (appearing "merciful"). McCain refused unless ALL POWs taken before him were released along with him. He went on to endure five and a half years of torture, starvation, solitary confinement, scheduled beatings and worse until his release in March of 1973.
McCain later went on to serve the state of Arizona in the Senate, and ran for President of the United States in 2008, ultimately losing the election to Barack Obama. McCain went back to serve in the Senate until his death in August, 2018. He was a member of the Republican party, but ultimately was fairly centrist in his policies. He was known for "telling it like it is", and his civility in disagreement during political discourse.
That's enough to understand his daughter's speech. Here are some interesting excerpts that stood out to me:
We gather to mourn the passing of American greatness, the real thing, not cheap rhetoric from men who will never come near the sacrifice, those that live lives of comfort and privilege while he suffered and served.
There seems to be some form of "higher masculinity" ascribed to suffering and overcoming that suffering, which she seems to use here to elevate her father's status above his political contemporaries. A "pull yourself up by your own bootstraps" sort of thing, taken to an extreme. Apparently as men, we are not allowed to receive help from the outside and must overcome extreme hardship on our own. This may have evolutionary origins; a man capable of overcoming difficulties on his own may be seen as a better protector and provider for the woman and her offspring.
My father was a great man. He was a great warrior. He was a great American.
It seems that "warrior" is a role men "should" fit by some female definitions. I'm also somewhat concerned about the implication that to be a "great American" is to be a great "warrior". It seems our culture, according to some, embraces the idea that to be a man, you must engage in violence, war and killing. This too may be evolutionary in origin: the superior cave-man combatant survived while the woman and children of his victims were at greater risk of death for their loss.
He was the son of a great admiral who was also the son of a great admiral. When it came time for the third John Sidney McCain to be a man, he had no choice but to walk in the same path. He had to become a sailor.
I'm not sure what this means, but the pattern of "following in [his/your] father's footsteps" is repeated here "smells" of evolutionary and/or other masculine expectations. Interested in the thoughts of others on this.
Imagine the warrior the night of the skies gently carrying his little girl to bed. Imagine the dashing aviator who took his aircraft, hurdling off pitching decks in the South China Seas, kissing the hurt when I fell and skinned my knee. Imagine the distinguished states man who counseled presidents singing with his girl in oak creek during a rainstorm to singing in the rain. Imagine the senator fierce conscience of the nation's best self taking his 14-year-old daughter out of school because he believed I would learn more about America at the town halls he held across the country. Imagine the loyal veteran with his eyes shining with happiness as he gave blessing for his grown daughter's marriage.
You all have to imagine that. I don't have to because I lived it all. I know who he was. I know what defined him. I got to see it every single day of my blessed life.
John McCain was not defined by prison, by the navy, by the senate, by the republican party or by any single one of the deeds in his absolutely extraordinary life. John McCain was defined by love.
There's a lot to unpack here, but the main reason I bring this excerpt is because it's of a child remembering the most touching moments of her father's love for her. In this forum we often, usually as a result of pain and experience, forget that women are fundamentally human beings, too, and despite the sociopathic behavior we often experience at their hands in the dating world, they do feel love and loss. This is a fact we'd be foolish to ignore.
Furthermore, we see here a dichotomy that seems to be a measure of strength; a near bi-polar sense of "killer" and "loving father", of "unbreakable stoic" meets "emotionally healthy and happy dad". While it's obvious that these extremes simply cannot exist in any healthy person, it's clear that women still, to some degree, have this expectation of men.
As a girl I didn't appreciate what I most fully appreciate now; how he suffered and how he bore it with a stoic silence that was once the mark of an American man.
Perhaps the most telling of McCain's eulogy, this passage tells us what we're expected to be, as men: stoic, capable of withstanding anything and everything without so much as a grumble. We are expected to be rock-solid, and clearly deviation from that, clearly our very human pain, and response to that pain, is not allowed.
I came to appreciate it first when he demanded it of me. I was a small girl, thrown from a horse and crying from a busted collarbone. My dad picked me up. He took me to the doctor, he got me all fixed up. Then he immediately took me back home and made me get back on the same horse. I was furious at him as a child, but how I love him for it now.
There's a lesson here for us, too. When you get hurt bad, get fixed up. Then get right back on that damn horse.
There are many other passages in her speech that bear discussion, but these most stood out to me. Hope there's some insight for some of my fellow men in these words.
Submitted September 01, 2018 at 11:31PM by mr_wiffles https://ift.tt/2N8BPjD
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